In many countries, childhood obesity is a growing problem. What are the reasons for this and what can individuals and governments do to tackle the problem?
In many countries across the world, nutritionists have been alerting
the
society about the huge number of Correct article usage
apply
children
with obesity. To understand the plight, this
essay will point out some reasons which cause such
public
health problem and will give possible solutions to diminish the impact of Correct article usage
a public
this
crisis.
Food
industry, nowadays, works hard to sell products which are designed for kids. It is possible to see that packages are full of colour and bring Add an article
The food
cartoon's
characters to catch Change noun form
cartoon
attention
of these little consumers. Add an article
the attention
Besides
that, kids are constantly assailed by advertising programs on TV, tablets and cellphones, which are created especially to make them desire the savoury snack or the sugary drink shown on it. However
, these products are not thought to have nutritional value and provide health to kids. Many of them are rich in fat and sugar which causes bad impacts on children
's health, such
as high blood pressure, diabets
and obesity.
Considering Correct your spelling
diabetes
this
, measures can be taken by the government to contain this
scenario. For example
, imposing guidelines concerning the usage of safe percetange
of sodium, sugar and fat on products, regulating Correct your spelling
percentage
advertisement
to avoid the aggressive approach on Fix the agreement mistake
advertisements
children
and providing clear information about nutritional components on the packages are some ways to deal with it. In addition
, individuals have also
their role in tackling this
problem. Parents have to be aware of their children
's food consumption.
To conclude
, I would say that obesity in infants are
a problem created by adults and Correct subject-verb agreement
is
have
to be solved by them. Correct subject-verb agreement
has
Thus
, this
task force depends on government regulation, parents
education and some sense from food companies to make our Change noun form
parents'
parent's
children
healthy.Submitted by carinabmurakami on
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Coherence and Cohesion
Expand the range of linking words used to improve the essay's flow. Introduce contrastive, consequential, and more complex connecting phrases to enhance readability and structure.
Coherence and Cohesion
While your introduction and conclusion are strong, try to sum up your arguments more concisely in the conclusion, directly relating them to your suggestions for solutions.
Task Achievement
Incorporate more detailed examples and statistics to support your arguments. This could include data on childhood obesity rates or studies on the effectiveness of government regulations.
Task Achievement
To improve task achievement, make sure to address all parts of the prompt thoroughly. In your essay, ensure that both the causes and solutions of childhood obesity are equally developed and explored.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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