Some old people today struggle with the use of modern techonologies such as smartphones and computers. What is the cause of this? What are some possible solutions?
Technology
has been developing day by day recently. It is quite challenging to catch the new technologies
due to
unexpectedly
rapid progression of Correct article usage
the unexpectedly
technology
. Therefore
, it is natural to struggle with use
of technological devices even for young Add an article
the use
people
sometimes.
Old people
didn't grow up with technology
. They used to spend their times
with things which required different abilities. Fix the agreement mistake
time
For
example
they had to cook, clean, read, Add a comma
example,
study
without any Correct word choice
and study
tool
which made those things easier. With the unstoppable development of Fix the agreement mistake
tools
technologies
, daily needs has
been getting easier but only by being able to Change the verb form
have
use
these devices. Old people
struggle with the use
of technological devices because they are not used to
. Correct pronoun usage
to them
Additionally
, their health issues like poor visual capacity or motor ability make their experience harder.
Most of the old people
spend their times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
with
doing nothing nowadays. Governments can open modern Change preposition
apply
technology
courses for old people
. Thus
, they can learn not only how to use
mobile phones or laptops but also
be able to develop theirselves
in Correct your spelling
themselves
this
field. In addition
to
, their Change preposition
apply
childs
and Correct your spelling
children
grandchilds
should support them to Correct your spelling
grandchildren
being
able to Wrong verb form
be
use
these technologies
.
In conclusion, it is important to emphasize that old people
struggle with the use
of modern technology
because they are not used to
. Correct pronoun usage
to it
However
, that doesn't mean that they will fail to learn how to use
these technologies
. With the collaboration of community
and governments, old Correct article usage
the community
people
can easily learn use
Fix the infinitive
to use
of
Change preposition
apply
technology
. Furthermore
, there can be recruitment attempts for some of those people
.Submitted by vincase36 on
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task response
Consider refining your introduction to more directly address the question's key points. For instance, briefly mention the causes and some solutions to the challenges faced by older people with technology.
task response
Work on developing more specific examples throughout your essay to support your points. For example, when discussing the struggles of older individuals with technology, mention specific technologies or incidents where these struggles are evident.
coherence and cohesion
Improve paragraph organization by dedicating distinct sections to discussing causes and solutions separately. This division will make your argument clearer and more persuasive to the reader.
coherence and cohesion
Try to connect your ideas more fluidly throughout the essay. Use transition words and phrases to guide the reader through your argument, showing how each point relates to the next.
coherence and cohesion
To strengthen your main points, consider adding more detailed examples and explanations. This approach will make your arguments more convincing and demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic.
task response
For a higher score, ensure the conclusion succinctly summarizes the main points and reiterates the significance of finding solutions for the problem addressed.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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