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Band 7.5

Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experince and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

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It has been debated whether it is an academic
degree
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 or it is emotional intelligence skills more crucial for finding a
job
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. In
this
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 essay, I will compare these stances and give my opinion. On the one hand, there are careers relying intensively on university education. Fields like research, working in a laboratory and, academic professions require a form of a
degree
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 from an institution.
Furthermore
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, it is not important to have an extremely high social skill for choosing these paths of succession.
For example
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, research conducted by Harvard University between the professors and lab supervisors operating in the university shows that the average EQ of the
people
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 working in
this
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 prestigious institution is marginally lower than normal.
On the other hand
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, not only there are fewer jobs requiring a
degree
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, but
also
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 most jobs require communication, teamwork and, social problems management abilities. Nowadays most careers are tied with communications and if a person lacks some
degree
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 of human-to-human interaction experience, it would become bothersome for them to do teamwork and interact with their colleagues or even deal with customers.
Hence
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, most companies and associations nowadays look for
people
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 with high social intelligence.
For instance
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, studies show that almost 60 per cent of
job
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 request rejections after interviews are associated with a lack of ability to interact with others and
also
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, another study reveals that
people
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 with lower essential skills tend to be out of a
job
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 more often than
people
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 possessing them. In conclusion, I believe that soft skills are more critical when finding a
job
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.
However
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, for a few career paths, it is more pivotal to have some kind of
degree
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 in that subject.

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Task Achievement
Make sure to present and develop all your main points fully to enhance clarity and depth.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider adding clearer connections between your ideas and paragraphs to improve the flow of your essay.
Task Achievement
Provide more specific examples related to soft skills in your arguments to strengthen your position.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with distinct paragraphs for each side, making it easy to follow.
Task Achievement
The stance is clearly stated in the introduction and conclusion, providing a clear viewpoint for the reader.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • benefit
  • job market
  • academic knowledge
  • critical thinking
  • specialized skills
  • practical experience
  • soft skills
  • employability
  • internships
  • networking
  • theoretical knowledge
  • adaptability
  • dynamic work environment
  • marketable skills
  • lifelong learning
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