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Writing Samples
Band 5

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The table below shows information about age, average income per person and population below poverty line in three states in the USA. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The table below shows information about age, average income per person and population below poverty line in three states in the USA. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#minutes #information #age #income #person #population #poverty #line #three #states #usa #features #comparisons
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The frame above illustrates figures in three states in the United States. The features are age, average income per
person
, and
population
 beneath the line of poverty. The states are
California
,
Utah
 and
Florida
. Concerning
on aged
Change preposition
age
show examples
,
Utah
 has
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 higher percentual of youngers, about 28% of their
population
,
whereas
Florida
 has
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 higher percentual of people over 60 years (23%).
Utah
 has almost a third of
their
Correct pronoun usage
its
show examples
population
 over 60 years
when
Correct word choice
old when
show examples
 compared to
Florida
.
California
 depicts intermediate numbers in both ranges (under 18 and over 60). Analysing the average amount earned per
person
,
California
 has the major value ($ 23.000), followed by
Florida
 ($ 22.000), and
Utah
 ($ 17.000) is in the
last
 position among the three administrative regions. The difference between
California
 and
Florida
 is only $1.000. In spite of the fact that
California
 has a good income per
person
,
this
 state presents the worst percentage of people below
poverty
Correct article usage
the poverty
show examples
 line (16%).
On the other hand
,
Utah
 has a lower mean income per
person
,
however
, presents a better performance on
population
 above poverty, about 9%, when compared to
California
 and
Florida
 (12%).
Submitted by fmulato on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words person, population, california, utah, florida with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "presents" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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