Some believe that pupils should be given less homework, others say the opposite. What is your opinion?

#believe #pupils #homework

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On the other hand

Linking Words

, I would argue that having a

part time

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

job offers more benefits to children.

Firstly

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, it enables children to get work experience, which can greatly benefit them at a later stage in life.

For example

Linking Words

, by being exposed to a real work environment, they can get the chance to learn a number of skills

such

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as time management, teamwork, and communication.

As a result

Linking Words

, they can get a full-time job more easily in their adulthood since most companies nowadays look for potential employees with prior experience.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, having a

part time

Add a hyphen

part-time

show examples

job means that children can get a salary. As they learn to

fulfill

Change the spelling

fulfil

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some of their needs, they can not only help reduce their parents’ financial burden but they can

also

Linking Words

learn about money management, which better prepares them for

future

Correct article usage

the future

show examples

Submitted by Deddymus on Sun Mar 03 2024

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task achievement

The essay addresses a different topic than the one requested. Make sure to directly answer the question about the amount of homework children should have, rather than discussing the benefits of part-time jobs.

coherence cohesion

Begin with an introduction that outlines your main points, and conclude your essay with a summary of your arguments. This framework helps in presenting a clear and cohesive argument.

task achievement

Develop each of your main points with specific examples or evidence to support your argument. Although you have included some examples, ensure they directly relate to the given topic.

coherence cohesion

Organize your essay into clear paragraphs, each focusing on a specific point. This will improve the logical flow and readability of your text.

task achievement

The content of your essay must directly address the topic. Consider both sides of the argument before presenting your opinion to fully respond to the prompt.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

1 paragraphs

136 words

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Some believe that pupils should be given less homework, others say the opposite. What is your opinion?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some people think that government is responsible for the rise in obesity in children. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employed, rather than to work for a company or organization. why might this be the case? what could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

In the future it may be necessary for us to live on other planets. For this reason, some people believe that we should spend money now researching planets that could be a possible home, such as Mars. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

As the result of tourisms and the incresing number of people traveling, there's an growing demand for more flights. What problems does it have on the enviroment? What measures could be taken to solve the problem?

If old people are no longer physically, mentally or financially able to look after themselves, younger family members should be legally responsible for supporting them.