IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

As Earth runs out of natural resources, we have to started to look to space for solutions. However, some people argue that this is wrong thing to do, and instead we should look for alternative solutions here on Earth. To what extent to do you agree with them? What alternative might there be to exploiting space for natural resources?

#earth #resources #space #people #alternative
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
People
Use synonyms
 have started to look to
space
Use synonyms
 for the
solution
Use synonyms
Change preposition
to
show examples
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 our
Use synonyms
Change noun form
earth's
show examples
earth
Change noun form
earth's
show examples
 running out of natural resources problem.
Although
Linking Words
, some
people
Use synonyms
 think that it is not
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
right
Use synonyms
 thing to do. They think that
people
Use synonyms
 should look for
Use synonyms
alternatives
Change the noun form
alternative
show examples
 solutions on our
Earth
Use synonyms
. What statement is actually
right
Use synonyms
? Are there any
alternatives
Use synonyms
 that might avoid exploiting
space
Use synonyms
 for natural
recourses
Correct your spelling
resources
show examples
? Personally, I do agree with both statements,
although
Linking Words
 it may be a little bit more complicated
as
Correct word choice
than
show examples
 it seems. In my opinion, both of those solutions are quite logical.
Firstly
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
 should try to find an alternative
solution
Use synonyms
 on the
earth
Use synonyms
, as it is probably easier and faster.
Linking Words
While trying
Correct word choice
Trying
show examples
 to find any
solution
Use synonyms
 in
space
Use synonyms
, won’t only take a lot of time to find, but
also
Linking Words
 to make it come true, as currently our technologies are not that advanced to travel from planet to planet in order to test different materials that can be used as an alternative. And by
time
Add an article
the time
show examples
 I mean not a couple of years, but a couple of decades or maybe even centuries! So currently it is probably
right
Use synonyms
 to find
alternatives
Use synonyms
 on our
earth
Use synonyms
, over than in
space
Use synonyms
. But
also
Linking Words
 the fact that those
alternatives
Use synonyms
 we may find are not infinite either. So that means that in the future
perspective
Add a comma
perspective,
show examples
 the
space
Use synonyms
solution
Use synonyms
 is not a bad one either.
Overall
Linking Words
, in
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
nutshell
Add a comma
nutshell,
show examples
 I can say that both statements are
right
Use synonyms
 in their own way, but they definitely have their own downsides, which are quite crucial for humankind.
Submitted by vova.yaschuk95 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Clarify your stance early in the essay to avoid ambiguity. Present a thesis statement that distinctly outlines your viewpoint and steer the discussion accordingly.
task achievement
Develop your main ideas with more depth. Use specific examples and data to back your points, making them more persuasive and substantiated.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your essay is logically structured with clear and direct transitions between paragraphs. This aids in the clarity and flow of your argument.
coherence cohesion
Consider using a wider range of cohesive devices to link ideas more effectively. This could include conjunctions, lexical phrases, and synonyms to maintain a natural flow and enhance the readability of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Revisit the use of introductory and concluding paragraphs to make them more impactful. The introduction should clearly set up your argument, and the conclusion should succinctly summarize your viewpoints and restate why your position is valid.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: