Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #situation #job #shortage #money #situations

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Each person’s condition in

this

Linking Words

world is not the same. Some people are rich

while

Linking Words

others do not even have a dollar in their wallet. Some people think accepting a bad condition,

for

Linking Words

example

Add the comma(s)

example,

show examples

lack of money and

unsatisfying

Correct article usage

an unsatisfying

show examples

job, is better than trying to improve

such

Linking Words

conditions.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss both sides of the argument in detail

Linking Words

then

Correct word choice

and then

show examples

provide evidence as to why trying our best to

change

Use synonyms

the

situations

Fix the agreement mistake

situation

show examples

is better. Some people argue that we should just accept our situation whether it is bad or good, since it is part of our destiny. They think destiny is what God already decided upon us with no need to

change

Use synonyms

it. They assume that being poor is their fate because they do not have a proper job in government or company.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, avoiding

the

Correct article usage

show examples

bad situation can be achieved by trying our best to

change

Use synonyms

it. Everyone does have their own path but we, as individuals, can try our best to make that path reach a better life. Just like a saying, today is better than yesterday,

while

Linking Words

tomorrow is better than today. So, we must make sure we do our best for our life. Even though

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

a person does not have a monthly salary job, he or she should still think more

creative

Change the word

creatively

show examples

to find a way to generate a better income.

For example

Linking Words

, by being an entrepreneur, we can try to solve our

problem

Fix the agreement mistake

problems

show examples

related to money. Even by collecting trash, we can create useful things from the trash and sell

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

to get some money. In summary, it can be argued that

bad

Correct article usage

a bad

show examples

situation is not fate. We, as

human

Fix the agreement mistake

humans

show examples

, should have initiative and take action to

change

Use synonyms

the worse for the better.

Submitted by blackvv on Mon Mar 04 2024

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coherence cohesion

A clear introduction and conclusion are provided, showing a firm stance on the topic, which is great. Now, work on connecting ideas more smoothly within paragraphs to enhance flow. Cohesion can be further improved by using a wider range of linking phrases.

task achievement

Your essay successfully addresses the prompt, providing arguments for both sides and your own opinion. However, you could enrich your argument by adding more specific examples and data to fully support your points. This will make your essay more compelling and comprehensive.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

291 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

adversity
resilience
stoicism
contentment
cope
adapt
endure
persevere
settle
ambition
tenacious
determined
resourceful
optimistic
self-improvement
proactive
initiative
transform
overcome
confront

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Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

In some countries, fast food restaurants and supermarket is going money to schools to promote their products. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many counties are investing in new technology to deal with public. Why is this happening? Do you think it is an appropriate use of government money?

Should the government support artist, such as musicians, writers, and painters? Is it economically beneficial or is it just a waste of money? Why or why not?

One problem faced by almost every large city is traffic congestion. What do you think the causes are? What solutions can you suggest?

In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?