some people ay that now we can films on our phones or tablets there is no need to go to the cinema. others say that to be fully enjoyed, films need to be seen in a cinema. discuss both these views and gi9ve your opinion.
I live in new new release
Correct article usage
a moden
moden
area. Few people are rich and other Correct your spelling
modern
persons
are poor and medal class they are not Replace the word
people
afortable
Correct your spelling
comfortable
for
their movie tickets to watch their Change preposition
with
film
in Fix the agreement mistake
films
cinema
. Nowadays, Add an article
the cinema
a cinema
somw
family watch Correct your spelling
some
film
Fix the agreement mistake
films
in
their Change preposition
on
T.v
and mobile Correct your spelling
TVs
phone
or tablets. Some Fix the agreement mistake
phones
mans
see Correct your spelling
men
the
Correct article usage
a
film
in cinema
Add an article
the cinema
a cinema
in
once Change preposition
apply
in
Change preposition
apply
a months
. In Correct the article-noun agreement
a month
months
thsi
Correct your spelling
this
essay
I will discuss Add a comma
essay,
in
some pros and cons in my below paragraph.
One of the Change preposition
apply
buring
Correct your spelling
burning
issue
of Change to a plural noun
issues
todays
world, There are many people Change to a genitive case
today's
live
in our country, some people are well-off and Wrong verb form
living
other
are working class. There are Fix the agreement mistake
others
differnce
in their person. Few lower-class Correct your spelling
differences
family
watchChange to a plural noun
families
Add an article
a
movie
Fix the agreement mistake
movies
in
their Change preposition
on
T.V
and Correct your spelling
TVs
smart phone
and other Correct your spelling
smartphone
opation
. Because they do not Correct your spelling
options
afortable
the cost of pictures. Correct your spelling
affordable
As
Change preposition
For
a
reason, some worker Correct article usage
apply
working
in a small Wrong verb form
work
comapny
, and their salary are very low to other employees. They Correct your spelling
company
allwes
see the movies Correct your spelling
always
in
their phone and Internet. As a Change preposition
on
results
, There are options Correct the article-noun agreement
result
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
avelable
in our city Correct your spelling
available
to
Change preposition
for
Correct article usage
the
film
. like many new Change preposition
of film
application
for Fix the agreement mistake
applications
netfilx
and hoststar and Change the capitalization
Netfilx
may
Correct your spelling
many
other
. Fix the agreement mistake
others
This
app are
very Change the verb form
is
usefull
Correct your spelling
useful
to see
Change preposition
for seeing
the
films Correct article usage
apply
in
mobile and many other options.
On the other side of coins, Change preposition
on
Therer
are many Correct your spelling
there
educations
persons and good Replace the word
educated
employer
Fix the agreement mistake
employers
live
in our city.They Wrong verb form
living
alwas
prefer to watch the Correct your spelling
always
brodcart
in Correct your spelling
broadcast
cinema
. Because they believe that watching moves
in Correct your spelling
movies
cinema
is good and enjoyment For their family and childen. For explain, some society
Trust for lot Fix the agreement mistake
societies
off
Change preposition
of
entertaiment provied
for their family. Correct your spelling
entertainment provided
Hence
, soem Rich person allwas watching films in cinema
because Correct article usage
the cinema
tehy
remove their Correct your spelling
they
strest
and tensions and enjoy to films, once Correct your spelling
stress
street
in
Change preposition
apply
a months
.
Correct the article-noun agreement
a month
months
For
conclusion, in my opinion Change preposition
In
film
in a Fix the agreement mistake
films
cinema
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
ggod
for resindent because they Correct your spelling
good
Add a missing verb
are allways
allways entertaiment
and Correct your spelling
always entertaining
remove
tension Verb problem
create
free
life.Correct your spelling
tension-free
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coherence cohesion
It's important to present a well-structured argument with clear paragraphs, each dedicated to a specific point. Consider organizing your essay with an introduction, at least two body paragraphs (discussing each view separately), and a conclusion. This will greatly improve the logical flow and structure of your argument.
task achievement
While you have attempted to introduce the topic and provide some discussion, your argument is difficult to follow due to grammatical errors and unclear sentences. Consider enhancing your task achievement by clearly stating your opinion and providing more developed examples to support each side of the argument. Try to specify your views with clearer, more comprehensive sentences and relevant examples.
coherence cohesion
Work on your grammatical accuracy and range of vocabulary. Frequent spelling, punctuation, and grammatical errors can make your essay difficult to understand. This detracts from your overall argument and makes it hard for the reader to follow. Using varied sentence structures and a wider range of vocabulary would also help articulate your points more clearly.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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