The only reason for people working hard is to earn money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#reason #people #money

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Generally,

Money

Use synonyms

is the most essential part of our life. Without any

Use synonyms

money

Add a comma

money,

show examples

we can not do anything in

todays

Change to a genitive case

today's

show examples

context. I

am totally agree

Change the verb form

totally agree

show examples

with the statement.

First,

Linking Words

Money

Use synonyms

is the most important part of our daily life. we need to earn

money

Use synonyms

to survive. In

todays

Change to a genitive case

today's

show examples

context people are working hard to earn

money

Use synonyms

so that they

gave

Wrong verb form

can give

show examples

their families a happy life.

Submitted by bibekluitel758 on Mon Mar 04 2024

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logical structure

Your essay lacks a clear introduction, body, and conclusion structure. To improve, make sure to clearly separate your essay into these parts, introducing your topic, developing your arguments, and summarizing your points in the conclusion.

introduction conclusion present

The essay does not have a clear introduction or conclusion. Begin your essay with a sentence that paraphrases the question or statement and end with a summary of your main points or a final thought on the topic.

supported main points

While your essay mentions working hard for money, it lacks specific examples or explanations to support your points. Make your argument stronger by including real-life examples, data, or detailed logical reasoning to explain why you agree with the statement.

complete response

Your essay response is incomplete and does not fully address the prompt. To improve, develop your essay further by elaborating on your viewpoint with more detailed explanations, analyses, or counterarguments to fully answer the question.

clear comprehensive ideas

While you provide a clear stance, the ideas need to be developed more comprehensively. Expand your essay by explaining the reasons behind your agreement, considering possible different perspectives, and providing more detailed examples.

relevant specific examples

To strengthen your argument, ensure to include relevant and specific examples that illustrate your point. These examples can be from your own experience, observations, or general knowledge, but they should directly support your argument about the importance of money.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

1
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

2 paragraphs

65 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Monetary gain
Passion-driven
Personal fulfillment
Career progression
Professional development
Work-life balance
Job satisfaction
Societal expectations
Cultural values
Altruism
Positive impact
Intrinsic motivation
Extrinsic motivation
Internal rewards
Maslow's hierarchy of needs
Psychological aspects
Motivational factors

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The only reason for people working hard is to earn money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Nowadays, some parents put a lot of pressure on their children. What is the reason for this? Is this a positive or negative development for the children?

Even though governments have worked hard to bring about improvements in the healthcare system, the overall standard of physical health in developed countries is decreasing. What are the potential reasons for this, and what are some of the long- term effects?

Today more people put personal and private information online to do everyday activities such as banking, shopping and socializing. Is this a positive or negative development?

Nowadays consumers are faced with the advertisements from all kinds of companies. To what extent do you agree that consumers are influenced by advertisements? What measures should be taken to protect them?