In many countries, prison is the solution to the problem of crime. However, another effective way is to provide people with better education so that they will not become criminals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#in #countries #prison #crime #people #education #criminals

Several countries around the globe adopted the idea that imprisonment is the best way to tackle violence.

Nevertheless

, others thought that providing better

education

can

Wrong verb form

could

show examples

eliminate crimes in

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society

. I totally agree with the latter view as ample reasons are present to substantiate it.

This

essay will delve into my viewpoint with relevant illustrations. First and foremost, one of the practical solutions to

adress

Correct your spelling

address

crimes within the

society

is to promote

education

among downtrodden

people

. In detail,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

poverty is the major reason for increasing crime within the community. It is true that several crimes are committed for

fullfilling

Correct your spelling

fulfilling

family needs and paying bills. As a solution, providing

education

and job training for these

people

may

enables

Wrong verb form

enable

show examples

better job opportunities. By doing

this

violence rate can be significantly reduced which is beneficial for the country.

Similarly

, since

education

will provide not only awareness about

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

crime but only

importance

Correct article usage

the importance

show examples

of respect

other's

Change preposition

for other's

show examples

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

and properties,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people

would

away

Add a missing verb

be away

show examples

from criminal activities.

Furthermore

usage

Correct article usage

the usage

show examples

of illegal drugs is one of the obvious reasons behind the anti-social mindset of the

people

, especially among

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

youngsters.

By educating

Change preposition

Educating

show examples

them about the side

affects

Correct your spelling

effects

show examples

of illegal drugs, and

support

Wrong verb form

supporting

show examples

them

for

Change preposition

show examples

rehabilitation,

undoubtably

Correct your spelling

undoubtedly

show examples

imporve

Correct your spelling

improves

the security of the

people

For example

anti-drug

Add an article

an anti-drug

the anti-drug

show examples

program in Alaska declined the domestic violence rate

for

Change preposition

over

show examples

past

Correct article usage

the past

show examples

few years.

Besides

, academic

institution

Fix the agreement mistake

institutions

show examples

will provide a

postive

Correct your spelling

positive

environment for the

poeple

Correct your spelling

people

who

had

Verb problem

are

show examples

in the clutches of anti-social groups. In conclusion, promoting

education

for downtrodden

people

will decrease the crime rate. awareness about the usage of drugs and rehabilitation would

imporve

Correct your spelling

improve

the security of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society

. Ergo, I believe that

education

is the practical way to reduce criminalism within

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society

Submitted by ck.manshad on Tue Mar 05 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Introduction & Conclusion

Ensure a clear thesis statement that summarizes your main point in the introduction. This makes your stance unmistakably clear to the reader.

Coherence & Cohesion

Use varied sentence structures and transitions to connect your ideas more smoothly. This will enhance the flow of your essay and make it easier for the reader to follow your argument.

Supporting Main Points

Support your points with more specific examples or data, as this strengthens your argument and makes it more persuasive.

Task Response

Address the prompt fully by discussing both sides of the argument, even if you are taking a clear stance. This shows a comprehensive understanding of the topic.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
30Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

283 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.
While some individuals believe it is wise to accept a difficult situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or a shortage of money, I firmly support the view that one should strive to improve their circumstances.
5
band
In some contries more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. what are the reasons for this? is this positive or negative development?
In today's fast paccing world, fitness is quite challanging to maintain for individuals. To balance healthy-toned body some prefers to have a personal fitness coach rather than not idulging in outdoor sports activities. However, there are some bright outcomes and drawbacks to seek personal help from fitness tutors. This essay will elaborate possible causes for new trends in fitness.
6
band
In some countries, younger people are neglecting their right to vote. What problems does this cause and what are some of the possible solutions?
It is argued that in certain nations youth are not using their right to vote. This would hinder the political change, and it would also result in policies made that are not beneficial for these young people. The most viable solutions would be to create awareness among the younger generation and promote them to participate in politics.
4
band
Some people work for the same organization all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organizations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
There are people prefer working in the same company through their whole life, by doing so they got a stable payment and working environment. Whereas others think is better to work in different organizations. Although working in the same firm for a long time could have a steady income and comfortable working environment, I believe that switch job properly could have a better job development opportunities.
6
band
It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?
In the current world, various issues are subject to debate. One of the issues is taking risks, not only in the professional but also in our personal lives. While taking risks has advantages and disadvantages, the benefits far outweigh the drawbacks. The following paragraphs will examine the numerous benefits of taking risks and why they are more important than the downsides.

In many countries, prison is the solution to the problem of crime. However, another effective way is to provide people with better education so that they will not become criminals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations.

In some contries more and more people are hiring a personal fitness trainer rather than playing sports or doing exercise classes. what are the reasons for this? is this positive or negative development?

In some countries, younger people are neglecting their right to vote. What problems does this cause and what are some of the possible solutions?

Some people work for the same organization all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organizations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?