5.Employers should give their staff at least a 4-week holiday a year. It can make them perform better in their work. To what extent do you agree or disagree

Recently,

workers

Use synonyms

have spent a large number of hours at the workplace. Many people believe that companies should give their employees at least a month's

holiday

Use synonyms

per year; in order to increase their productivity and creativity in their

work

Use synonyms

. In my opinion,

this

Linking Words

development will have a positive impact on both employers and employees because

workers

Use synonyms

will have more time to spend with their families and friends, which in turn can decrease their stress. Many people today have different types of responsibilities

besides

Linking Words

their

work

Use synonyms

, which could lead to an increase in their stress and a decrease in their hard

work

Use synonyms

. By giving them a four-week off per year, they may have a trip for relaxation away from their workplace.

This

Linking Words

could reduce their anxiety level, and enhance their mental well-being;

therefore

Linking Words

, they might become more concentrated at their

work

Use synonyms

For instance

Linking Words

, many well-known organizations

such

Linking Words

as NASA and Amazon give their staff a long

holiday

Use synonyms

to entertain and relax away from their companies and

work

Use synonyms

;

as a result

Linking Words

, their staff become more productive and concentrated at their

work

Use synonyms

This

Linking Words

development will not only benefit the

company

Use synonyms

's staff but

also

Linking Words

play an important role in improving the

company

Use synonyms

's economy. If

workers

Use synonyms

have a great time with their families or friends, they will put more effort and

work

Use synonyms

after returning from their trips; thereby, the

company

Use synonyms

's income will significantly grow.

For example

Linking Words

, a large number of employers today are aware of the importance of reducing the burden on employees by giving them a big

holiday

Use synonyms

, in order to increase the

company

Use synonyms

's economic level. In conclusion, bosses should give their

workers

Use synonyms

a long

holiday

Use synonyms

because

this

Linking Words

may lower their anxiety levels and promote their productivity.

Thus

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

may have a great impact on the organization's revenue.

zuhrakhirie1997

Dec 5, 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to guide the reader.

task achievement

Provide more specific examples to enhance the argument presented.

coherence cohesion

Good structure with introduction and conclusion clearly present.

task achievement

Main points are well supported, enhancing the overall argument.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

294 words

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