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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The line graph below shows changes in the amount and type of fast food consumed by Australian teenagers from 1975 to 2000. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph below shows changes in the amount and type of fast food consumed by Australian teenagers from 1975 to 2000. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#line #changes #amount #type #food #australian #teenagers #information #features #comparisons
The given line graph illustrates
consumption
Correct article usage
the consumption
show examples
 rate of fast food eaten the teenagers
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
Australian
Correct your spelling
Australia
show examples
 in terms of varieties and prices between 1975 and 2000. From an
overall
 perspective, Hamburgers kind of fast food was the most preference among the terns. Another interesting
noticable
Correct your spelling
noticeable
 change was Fish and Chips
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 popular in
initial
Correct article usage
the initial
show examples
 time
then
 it was placed
the
Change preposition
as the
show examples
 least preferable. In detail, fish a be chips
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 the majority
teens
Change preposition
of teens
show examples
 prefer 1975, at 100
times
 per year
while
 other two dishes
such
 as hamburgers and pizza had only below 15
times
. In 1980,
fish
Correct article usage
the fish
show examples
 and chips addition rate
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
decreased slightly, which
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 82
times
,
thereafter
, there was a slight increase in 1985, which
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 95
times
 and from 1985 to 2000, there was a rapid decrease, from 95
times
 to 39
times
.
In contrast
,
hamburgers
Change preposition
for hamburgers
show examples
 in 1975, American teens preferred the least amount, at 10
times
, after that, it was a significant increase between 1975 and 1995 and reached 100
times
.
Then
, from 1995 to 2000, there was a fluctuation and it was the most popular fast food end of the year among teens.
Similarly
, pizza, from 1975 to 1995, there was
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
rapid growth and reached from 5
times
 to 82
times
then
 it
was remained
Change to the active voice
remained
show examples
 stable until 2000.
Submitted by reanudeepan on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words times with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "rapid" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
▼

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • line graph
  • trends
  • consumption
  • type of fast food
  • popularity
  • peaked
  • hit a low
  • timeline
  • notable
  • switch
  • cultural trends
  • economic factors
  • marketing efforts
  • increase
  • decrease
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