Some people believe that the best way to encourage children that have a healthy diet at school and some people believe that parents should teach them to have a healthy diet. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

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Whether the
school
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or
parents
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play an imperative role in forming
children
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

's awareness related to quality
diet
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is
Verb problem
has

There may be a verb use issue here.

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emerged as a controversial topic of interest . The writer of
this
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eassy
Correct your spelling
essay

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claims that
due to
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

the period of time
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students

It seems that student may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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spending
Replace the word
spend

The word spending doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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with their family , it would be much easier for them to
gain
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an understanding
about
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of

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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a healthy
diet
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. One of the core reasons which apply for why
parents
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

should be the
pioneer
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pioneers

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in teaching
chilren
Correct your spelling
children

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about healthy
diet
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is
due to
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

their influence .
That is
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

to say , since the
child
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is born until being an
adult
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adults

It seems that adult may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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, they spend their whole childhood
on
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apply

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living with their
parents
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which is a reasonable
explaination
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explanation

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to
Change preposition
for

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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the fact that
children
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

tend to copy their
parents
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's behaviour and mindset .
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, when it comes to
healthy
Add an article
a healthy

The noun phrase healthy diet seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
diet
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

,
parents
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

who have an
understading
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understanding

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about
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of

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this
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

must be necessary to form the
child
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

's
knowledge
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

about
healthy
Add an article
a healthy

The noun phrase healthy diet seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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diet
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. Taking Singapore as an example ,
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

nation
have
Change the verb form
has

The plural verb have does not appear to agree with the singular subject this nation. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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been making
contribution
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contributions

It seems that contribution may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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to
run
Wrong verb form
running

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb run. Consider changing it.

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a
compaign
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campaign

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in order to
pursuade
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persuade

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parents
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to
gain
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knowledge
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about healthy
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

diet
Fix the agreement mistake
diets

It seems that diet may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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which can be used to teach their
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
child
Fix the agreement mistake
children

It seems that child may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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in later future. When it comes to a healthy
diet
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, it must be recognised that
school
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, as a symbol of education , should take
responsibilty
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responsibility

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to teach
children
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about
this
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

is because
,
Remove the comma
apply

It appears that you have an unnecessary comma after the subordinating conjunction because. Consider removing the comma.

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Use synonyms
school
Change the article
a school

It appears that the article usage in the phrase school is incorrect. Consider making a change.

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is a place where
children
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gain
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most
Correct article usage
the most

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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knowledge
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about the world .
Thus
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, if teachers make
effort
Correct article usage
an effort

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to form fundamental
understandings
Fix the agreement mistake
understanding

It seems that understandings may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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aboult
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about

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healthy
diet
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, the students can
gain
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

benefit from
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as they know how to maintain a healthy lifestyle based on their
diet
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the schedule of a student who
study
Change the verb form
studies

The plural verb study does not appear to agree with the singular subject a student. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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in America contains
a cooking classes
Correct the article-noun agreement
cooking classes
a cooking class

The indefinite article a may not be required with the plural noun classes in this sentence. Consider removing the article, or changing the noun to singular.

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which
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are

It seems that the verb is does not agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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used to teach
chilren
Correct your spelling
children

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the way to make
healthy
Add an article
a healthy

The noun phrase healthy diet seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
diet
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, leading to the highest proportion of residents having
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
knowledge
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

related to
healthy
Add an article
a healthy

The noun phrase healthy diet seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
diet
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. It is the writer's opinion
as
Correct word choice
that

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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parents
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is
Change the verb form
are

The singular verb is does not appear to agree with the plural subject parents. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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the only
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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who can
make
Verb problem
apply

There may be a verb use issue here.

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communications
Replace the word
communicate

The word communications doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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to
Change preposition
with

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, forming the
child
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

's understanding
about
Change preposition
of

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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healthy
Correct article usage
a healthy

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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diet
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

must be their job . It must be recognised that
children
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

will have different
taste
Fix the agreement mistake
tastes

It seems that taste may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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of
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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healthy food , which is a
difficulties
Change the noun form
difficulty

The subject or subject complement of the sentence (difficulties) does not appear to agree with the verb is. Consider changing the noun form.

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for
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools

It seems that school may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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as they need to make a general
diet
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

for many students .
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
parents
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

can solve
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

burden as they can make heart-to-heart talk with their
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

so as to find out their taste of healthy food .
Thus
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, not only leading them to a healthy lifestyle but
parents
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

can teach the
children
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

more about
the
Correct article usage
a

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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healthy
diet
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

In conclusion , the role of
parents
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and
school
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

, both are essential to
children
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

's
knowledge
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

about healthy
diet
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

,
however
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
due to
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

the
Correct your spelling
quantity
quality
Correct your spelling
quantity
quality

If you don’t want quanity to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

quanity
Correct your spelling
quantity
of
Correct your spelling
communications
communication
Correct your spelling
communications
communication

If you don’t want commucations to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

commucations
Correct your spelling
communication
and time
children
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

spend with their family , it is reasonable that
parents
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

will take over the
Correct your spelling
responsibility
Correct your spelling
responsibility

If you don’t want responsibilty to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

responsibilty
Correct your spelling
responsibility
to form right awareness about
healthy
Add an article
a healthy

The noun phrase healthy diet seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
diet
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

for their
kins
Correct your spelling
kids

The word kins doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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Spelling and Grammar
Be careful with spelling and grammatical errors, as these can detract from the clarity of your arguments. For example, 'essay' is misspelled as 'eassy', and 'children' is misspelled as 'chilren'. Additionally, pay attention to proper punctuation and capitalization.
Structure
Enhance the structure of your essay by clearly delineating introduction, body, and conclusion sections. Your introduction and conclusion could be made more distinct for a cleaner organizational scheme, which would also improve reader understanding.
Elaboration
While your essay addresses the task and provides relevant examples, try to further elaborate on your ideas for a more in-depth discussion. For instance, expand on how parents' influence is significant compared to that of schools by including more examples or studies.
Coherence
Improve coherence by using a wider range of linking words or phrases to better connect your ideas and paragraphs. This will make your essay flow more smoothly from one point to the next.
Task Response
To boost your task response score, ensure that your opinion is clear throughout the essay, not just in the conclusion. Integrate your stance more explicitly in the introduction and consistently support it throughout your body paragraphs.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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