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Writing Samples
Band 5

The line chart below shows the results of a survey giving the reasons why people moved to the capital city of a particular country. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line chart below shows the results of a survey giving the reasons why people moved to the capital city of a particular country. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#line #results #survey #people #city #country #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The line chart depicts the
reasons
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
apply
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why people decided to leave their hometowns and base themselves in the
city
Use synonyms
center
Change the spelling
centre
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 of a particular country
through
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over
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 a period of 15 years. From an
overall
Linking Words
 perspective,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 the majority of
individuals
Use synonyms
 decided to pursue a better horizon regarding their futures
,
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apply
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 since employment and study are the main
reasons
Use synonyms
 for 90% of the surveyed
individuals
Use synonyms
 in 2015.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
reasons
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such
Linking Words
 as adventures and family have ranked lower, since at least around 3 of 10
individuals
Use synonyms
 move to the
city
Use synonyms
 for these
reasons
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. It is important to recognize the gradual growth of the variable of study
,
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apply
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 since it witnessed a remarkable growth since the 2000's.
At
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In
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 the beginning it only represented 30% of the
reasons
Use synonyms
 for moving to the
city
Use synonyms
, albeit it
high-rocketed
Correct your spelling
highrocketed
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 in a range of five years only, passing from 50% in 2010 to almost 90% in 2015. An interesting fact is the noticeable decrease
on
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in
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 the
employeement
Correct your spelling
employment
 factor for citizens.
While
Linking Words
 it was why
halve
Correct your spelling
half
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 of the population decided to move to the
city
Use synonyms
 in 2000,
this
Linking Words
cipher
Change the spelling
cypher
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 witnessed a stable decrease a tiny bit since its peak in 2010, with over 90% of the
individuals
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 moving to the capital in order to look for new job opportunities. In conclusion, the factors of education and work represented the main
reasons
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 for people to abandon their hometown in order to seek
for
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apply
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new opportunities in the
city
Use synonyms
 from 2000 to 2015.
While
Linking Words
 other factors
such
Linking Words
 as social bonds or adventures
remaint
Correct your spelling
remains
remain
constantly
Change the word
constant
show examples
 under 30%.
Submitted by alejandragarciabaez.9 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "such, while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words reasons, city, individuals with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "represented" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "move" was used 2 times.
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