Some people say that what children watch on television influences their behavior, while others say the amount of time children spend watching television influences their behavior. Discuss both views and give your opinion
Nowadays, most
of
companies spend a lot of money on Change preposition
apply
adversting
and promotions for several reasons. Some argue that the marketing has achieved Correct your spelling
advertising
attract
Wrong verb form
attracted
people
to purchase their products
, while
others believe that poeple
do not follow or read promotions properly. In my opinion, I think that the marketing is able to push Correct your spelling
people
people
to buy it.
On the one hand, the main cause of adverts which
that they attract individuals to use their materials is human nature. Correct pronoun usage
apply
In other words
, people
are usually interest
Change the verb form
are usually interested
into
what Change preposition
in
that
they see it. Correct word choice
apply
Therefore
, majority
of large companies advertise their manufacturing. Correct article usage
the majority
For example
, Correct article usage
the Iphone
Iphone
company doubled their profits in 2011 in Correct your spelling
iPhone
comparating
2010. Verb problem
comparison to
This
is beause
Correct your spelling
because
Correct article usage
the Iphone
Iphone
Organization created Correct your spelling
iPhone
really
Correct article usage
a really
facsinating vedio
for marketing their Correct your spelling
fascinating video
products
and spread
it in different countries. As Wrong verb form
spreading
aresult
, more and more citizenships had known about their technical Correct your spelling
a result
products
such
as smartphone
, Fix the agreement mistake
smartphones
computer
etc, and bought them.
Fix the agreement mistake
computers
On the other hand
, the main cause of promotions which that
it is absolutely ordinary Correct word choice
apply
todays
and they can not encourage Correct your spelling
today
people
buy
them is Add the particle
to buy
giving
feel boring . Obviously, many Verb problem
that they makes it
people
and customers complain about companies’ advertising . This
is because when they want to spend time on Correct article usage
the internet
internet
they Capitalize word
Internet
obligate
to read or watch adverts and they take Wrong verb form
are obligated
marketıng
Correct your spelling
marketing
massages
ragularly from shops where they bought their materials before. Correct your spelling
messages
Hence
, people
prefer
avoid Add the particle
prefer to
from
the annoying .
Personally, I think that the perfect praise adverts Change preposition
apply
has
Change the verb form
have
push
Wrong verb form
pushed
poeple
to consume Correct your spelling
people
it
. In fact, Correct pronoun usage
them
individiuals
Correct your spelling
individuals
affect
positively or negatively Wrong verb form
are affected
from
seeing Change preposition
by
thing
. Fix the agreement mistake
things
Thus
, big factories invest in following customers what they need to Correct pronoun usage
apply
it
or Correct pronoun usage
apply
interst
Correct your spelling
interest
Correct your spelling
in
int
Correct your spelling
in
Wrong verb form
using
use
. Replace the word
using
For instance
, Correct article usage
the head
head
manager of Zara Clothes Shopping company said that they Correct article usage
the head
spend
around one million dollars Wrong verb form
spent
Change preposition
on
to
Change preposition
on
Correct article usage
the technology
technology
Correct article usage
the technology
Fix the agreement mistake
systems
system
. It canFix the agreement mistake
systems
following
Change the verb form
follow
be following
costumers
to use their Correct your spelling
customers
products
if they need and
automatically send them their marketing Correct pronoun usage
them and
deal
.
In conclusion, the advertising impact on encouraging to Fix the agreement mistake
deals
Correct your spelling
buy
bu
their Correct your spelling
buy
products
or not is controversial
topic and Add an article
a controversial
due to
the reasons Correct your spelling
mentioned
metioned
above Correct your spelling
mentioned
is
seems more logical that the marketing has ability Correct your spelling
it
people
to purchaseSubmitted by ab.ciyani on
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task achievement
To improve task achievement, focus on fully answering the given prompt by discussing both views and providing your opinion clearly. Ensure each paragraph contributes to a complete response.
task achievement
To increase clarity and the comprehensiveness of your ideas, expand on your reasoning with more detailed examples and explanations. This will help to make your argument more persuasive and easier to follow.
task achievement
Strengthen your essay by using a mix of specific, relevant examples and explaining in detail how they support your points. This will enrich your argument and make it more compelling.
coherence and cohesion
For a better logical structure, organize your essay into clear paragraphs with topic sentences that introduce the main idea of each paragraph. Ensure there is a logical flow from one idea to the next.
coherence and cohesion
Make sure your essay has a distinct introduction and conclusion. The introduction should present the topic and your thesis statement, while the conclusion should summarize your main points and restate your opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure your main points are well-supported with explanations, examples, and arguments that logically follow from your thesis. This will make your essay more coherent and cohesive.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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