Students should be allowed to choose academic courses or practical courses, e.g carpenters. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

It is considered by some that playing

video

Use synonyms

games

Use synonyms

is harmless, or even

benefital

Correct your spelling

beneficial

for education,

while

Linking Words

others rebut that

this

Linking Words

hobby impacts

players

Use synonyms

negatively.

This

Linking Words

essay will delve into both sides of

statement

Correct article usage

the statement

show examples

before rendering my support for the latter one. Those in support of the latter stance might debate that the process of playing

video

Use synonyms

games

Use synonyms

could promote

players

Use synonyms

’ minds when dealing with educational problems.

For instance

Linking Words

Players

Use synonyms

might fight with some rivals in the

games

Use synonyms

, which means they demand to figure out the main shortages of them, to be more specific, they should rapidly recognize the rivals’ features and find out the weakest ones.

In other words

Linking Words

, these processes of overcoming the impediments in

games

Use synonyms

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

resemble

Remove the preposition

apply

show examples

those for coping the educational problems

such

Linking Words

as mathematics or physical puzzles, which means if

players

Use synonyms

could use the process of thinking

while

Linking Words

coping with educational problems, they might have a greater result compared to those have never touched

games

Use synonyms

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, I would rebut that

video

Use synonyms

games

Use synonyms

would lead

Change preposition

apply

show examples

people to be addicted. Take students that keen on

this

Linking Words

fun as an example, they might

unable

Add a missing verb

be unable

show examples

to control themselves because of their

intension

Replace the word

intention

show examples

to get a higher score than their friends or pass the entire game, which might lead to them

to be

Change the verb form

being

show examples

distracted by

this

Linking Words

fun

although

Linking Words

they should spend more spirit on their academic assignments and socializing. In

this

Linking Words

case, probably would they result in bad consequences in

study

Add an article

the study

show examples

and even lose their friends. In conclusion, playing

video

Use synonyms

games

Use synonyms

is truly harmful to

players

Use synonyms

because it would

diverts

Change the verb form

divert

show examples

their concentration from their affairs on school or work

although

Linking Words

some contend it might improve

players

Use synonyms

’ minds.

luoyinjian2Thu Mar 07 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

To improve task achievement, ensure your essay fully addresses all parts of the prompt. Include more varied and specific examples to support your arguments.

coherence cohesion

To enhance coherence and cohesion, consider using a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas more smoothly. Ensure paragraphs are well-organized, with a clear main idea supported by examples.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

279 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
some people believe that increasing violence in the media is the cause of increasing violence in our society, especially among children. others believe that children's peer groups and parental role models are a much more powerful influence on children's behavior.
Nowadays, people are able to gain knowledge through media thanks to globalization. The internet allows everyone, including children, to consume everything from everywhere easily. Unfortunately, the internet itself is a free space, which has the possibility to provide harmful content such as violence. Therefore, I strongly believe that parental methods and peer groups play a significant role in children's mindset and response towards violence issues. However, there are several things that we need to address regarding media management rules.
7
band
Doing an enjoyable activity with a child can develop better skill and more creative than reading to what extent do you agree or disagree use reason and specific example for to explain your answer.
Nowadays,the stages of growth and development have a pivotal role in a kid's life.During each developmental milestone,they grow physically and mentally.By doing fascinating play with a baby can develop their ability,and they become more creative than learning books.I strongly agree with this statement.This essay will discuss the reasons for the agreement in detail ,along with a relevant conclusion.
7.5
band
As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing. What factors contribute to job satisfaction? How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?
The essential component in people’s happiness is the sense of satisfaction in their work because adults spend most of their time working. One’s fulfilment can be influenced by wages and supportive coworkers. However, these days many workers are dissatisfied with their jobs because of an imbalance between the amount of paycheck and the responsibility.
7.5
band
Nowadays children play computer games for long hours. They do not play old traditional games. What do you think are the reasons for this? Do you think it influences children in a good or bad way?
These days young people are addicted to computers. They spend too much time using them for entertaining purposes rather than having traditional leisure time activities. This essay suggests that it has a bad impact on the younger generation.
7.5
band
Some people believe that construction of new public buildings such as museums, towns halls and sporting is more important than renovation of the existing ones, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.
As a result, there is a growing trend in rebuilding picture galleries and municipal halls. While some individuals believe that this is a necessary step, although it may be expensive, another group claims that it should be replaced with something contemporary. I strongly agree with the former.

Students should be allowed to choose academic courses or practical courses, e.g carpenters. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

some people believe that increasing violence in the media is the cause of increasing violence in our society, especially among children. others believe that children's peer groups and parental role models are a much more powerful influence on children's behavior.

Doing an enjoyable activity with a child can develop better skill and more creative than reading to what extent do you agree or disagree use reason and specific example for to explain your answer.

As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing. What factors contribute to job satisfaction? How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?

Nowadays children play computer games for long hours. They do not play old traditional games. What do you think are the reasons for this? Do you think it influences children in a good or bad way?

Some people believe that construction of new public buildings such as museums, towns halls and sporting is more important than renovation of the existing ones, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.