It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year off between finishing school and going to university. What are the advantage and disadvantages of this?
In these
days, there is a trend of students taking a year off during their school Change preposition
These
life
. It is called the 'gap year Use synonyms
program
'. There are diverse opinions about Use synonyms
this
Linking Words
program
. I will explore the disadvantages and advantages in Use synonyms
this
essay.
First of all, opponents of Linking Words
this
Linking Words
program
believe that the gap year Use synonyms
program
is likely to give students too much freedom. Especially their parents might think so. They believe that too much freedom could be used to spoil their Use synonyms
children
. They explain that their Use synonyms
children
could not handle too much free Use synonyms
time
out of the blue. Another problem is a financial issue. Use synonyms
Time
spent taking rest needs to be spent with more money. If they don't have money, the Use synonyms
time
would be useless.
Use synonyms
On the other hand
, advocates believe Linking Words
this
Linking Words
program
could be a decent opportunity for students. In fact, there are aspects that Use synonyms
children
have learned from their parents's orders. They can explain that their Use synonyms
children
need to find a true calling in their lives. Use synonyms
Thus
, the Linking Words
children
can realize their self-esteem and real wants during free Use synonyms
time
.
Use synonyms
At the end
of the day, our Linking Words
life
is just like a road searching for happiness in our lives. Use synonyms
Life
is just like a box of chocolates. We don't know what we will obtain from Use synonyms
life
's box. I believe that it would be crucial Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
children
Use synonyms
have
Fix the infinitive
to have
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
time
for their future.Use synonyms
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task achievement
Your essay provides a balanced view on the advantages and disadvantages of taking a gap year, which is good. However, it would benefit from more specific examples to support your points. Instead of general statements, include personal anecdotes or researched examples to make your arguments more convincing.
task achievement
Ensure clarity in your argument by reinforcing your thesis statement in both the introduction and conclusion. Strengthen your conclusion by summarizing your main points and stating your personal stance more clearly. This will improve the task achievement score.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay follows a logical structure, progressing from an introduction to body paragraphs and a conclusion. However, the transitions between ideas can be smoothed out by using more cohesive devices, such as conjunctions and connective phrases. This will enhance the flow of your essay.
coherence and cohesion
Avoid colloquial expressions and idioms that may not be universally understood or appropriate for formal writing. Phrases like "Life is just like a box of chocolates" can detract from the academic tone of your essay. Opt for more formal expressions.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.