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Writing Samples /
Band 4

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#two #maps #show #road #access #city #summarise #information #features #comparisons
There are
two
 maps that perspectively illustrate the situations of a
road
 accessing
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a
city
 hospital in 2007 and 2010.
According to
 them, it is apparent that there were plenty of modifications
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the
road
 itself
as well as
 its
surroudings
Correct your spelling
surroundings
. In 2007, there were
two
 roads
cross connected
Add a hyphen
cross-connected
show examples
 and formed a junction in the south of the
city
 hospital, one was a west-east directional
road
 named
City
Road
,
the
Correct word choice
and the
show examples
 other was a north-south
directioned
Correct your spelling
direction
road
 named Hospital
Road
, leading to the front door of the hospital and connecting with a ring
road
sourrounding
Correct your spelling
surrounding
 it. Six bus stops were
also
 separated into
to
Correct your spelling
two
show examples
 parts and situated on
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
both sides of the Hospital
Road
. Apart from that, a rectangle-shaped
car
park
 for staff and
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
 was
also
costructed
Correct your spelling
constructed
 on the left side of it. In 2010,
this
 area had been greatly redeveloped. It was noteworthy that
two
roundabout
Change to a plural noun
roundabouts
show examples
 appeared, one was built at the junction of the
City
Road
 and Hospital
Road
,
the
Correct word choice
and the
show examples
 other was added in front of the
City
 Hospital. These
two
roundabout
Change to a plural noun
roundabouts
show examples
 connected with a bus station, which took place the former six bus stops and located in the left area of the Hospital
Road
. What's more, the previous
car
park
 was only used by
staffs
Fix the agreement mistake
staff
show examples
 and a new public
car
park
 was constructed on the eastern part of the hospital, residents could enter it through the Ring
Road
. In summary, the
road
 leading to the
city
 hospital
had been
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
 completely redesigned from 2007 to 2010, particularly in the construction of the
two
 roundabouts and public
car
park
, making it a more convenient place for residents nearby.
Submitted by 1320493878 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words two, road, city, car, park with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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