Some people think that social networking sites have a huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

With the invention and development of Intermit, social media has become a daily routine for
majority
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the majority
show examples
of
people
. Some
people
regard it as something negative and harmful,
whereas
others may have different points of
views
Fix the agreement mistake
view
show examples
on the statement. In my perspective, I disagree with the opinion because
Firstly
, social networking
sites
bring enormous benefits to both individuals and society
instead
of just negative consequences.
For instance
,
there
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apply
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are increasing
e-shops
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number of e-shop
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owners use social media as a platform to advertise their products, which means they are able to reach more potential customers willing to buy their products and enhance their profits. As for the whole society, it even serves as a measure to reduce the unemployment rates as everyone has access to sell products or services for
living
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a living
show examples
.
Thus
, social media
also
can be a practical tool
to solve
Change preposition
for solving
show examples
some problems
such
as high unemployment rates despite it has demerits if
people
use it improperly.
Secondly
, social networking
sites
provide various information that you cannot receive in normal life with
people
, which
improve
Correct subject-verb agreement
improves
show examples
effective knowledge exchange between individuals and other communities.
For example
, I decided to study abroad for
further
education, but I had
few
Correct quantifier usage
little
show examples
information about
preparing
Replace the word
the preparation
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process.
Furthermore
,
people
around me lacked relevant information, so the help from them
were
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was
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limited.
However
, thanks to the social networking
sites
, which enable me to read and collect some sharing experience from other users on social networking
sites
.
Therefore
, the merits of social networking
sites
could not
Wrong verb form
cannot
show examples
be ignored. In conclusion, there is no denying that some
people
especially parents or teachers
concern
Wrong verb form
concerned
show examples
the
Change preposition
about the
show examples
side effects of overusing social networking
sites
;
however
, I consider the problems can be prevented by education and
guide
Replace the word
guidance
show examples
.
As a result
, I disagree with the statements since not every part of the social networking site is detrimental.
Submitted by s813492a on

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Task Response
Ensure that your introduction clearly states your position on the prompt to immediately convey your perspective to the reader. For task response improvement, articulate your stance more unmistakably in the introduction.
Task Response
Develop your main points with more specific and varied examples. This will make your argument more convincing and improve the completeness of your response. Use more detailed scenarios or statistics to back up your claims.
Coherence and Cohesion
Make logical connections between your sentences and paragraphs more apparent. This can be achieved through better use of linking words and clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and explore this idea in depth. This will strengthen the coherence of your writing and make your argumentation more persuasive.

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • social isolation
  • virtual interactions
  • mental health
  • feelings of inadequacy
  • anxiety
  • depression
  • misinformation
  • destabilize
  • privacy concerns
  • data breaches
  • productivity
  • foster connections
  • educational content
  • social activism
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