The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, anomake comparisons where relevant.

#shops #country #summarise #information #features #anomake #comparisons

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The total retail outlets that were newly run and bankrupt, which were completely recorded from 2011 to 2018, were presented in the line graph.

Overall

Linking Words

, it was noticeable that the former and the latter significantly showed a different pattern until the end of the period.

In addition

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, the number of old shops closed was lower in 2018 than the new stores. In 2001, the number of new stores initiated was over 8,000 units, which was one-third of the closure of retail. In the following three years, the startup businesses went downhill to below 4,000 before their number rocketed, accounting for the 6,000 level. Meanwhile, the ladder fluctuated and

finally

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landed at 6,200 points.

Moreover

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, the same as the former, the bankruptcy of retail dropped almost to zero in 2015,

while

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the young stores

also

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declined slightly to 4,000. Surprisingly, the ladder tended to enhance considerably, reaching over five thousand;

in contrast

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, the opponents only grew up minimally by 0.1% in 2016.

Finally

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, in the

last

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two years, they ended up in different spots, and the former was superior to the ladder, 5,100 versus 3,000.

Submitted by soniandriawan1992 on Sat Mar 09 2024

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "finally".

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.

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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

184 words

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The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, anomake comparisons where relevant.

Many people believe that countries should produce food for the whole population and import as little food as possible. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

People, who go to live in other countries should follow the customs and tradition of the new country, to what extent to do you agree or disagree?

People believe that some individuals are born with leadership skills, while others think that leadership skills can be made. Discuss both views.

With advancing technology, the development of automated vehicles is becoming reality. In your opinion, what are the advantages and disadvantages of self-driving vehicles?