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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, anomake comparisons where relevant.

The graph below shows the number of shops that closed and the number of new shops that opened in one country between 2011 and 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, anomake comparisons where relevant.
#shops #country #summarise #information #features #anomake #comparisons
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The line graph illustrates
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
how
much
Correct quantifier usage
many
show examples
 stores opened and closed during a seven-year period in an unnamed state.
Overall
Linking Words
, there is a downward trend
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
both figures.
However
Linking Words
, the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of
shop's
Change noun form
shop
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 closures outnumbered its openings.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, there were more than 8500 newly established
store
Fix the agreement mistake
stores
show examples
 in 2011. The figure
then
Linking Words
 plunged to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
more than
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half of its previous number in 2012. Before witnessing a stable decrease
over
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2014, it increase steadily
tried at
Verb problem
to
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 around 6000 new stores from 2013 to 2014.
In
Change the preposition
At
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 the end of
given
Add an article
a given
the given
show examples
 period, 2018, there were only 3000 additions to the number of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
new
store
Fix the agreement mistake
stores
show examples
 in that country.
Conversely
Linking Words
, the case of
shop's
Change noun form
shop
show examples
 closure which was less in
the
Change the article
apply
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2011, fluctuated before experiencing a
radican
Correct your spelling
radical
Radican
 downward in 2015 from above 6000 at the beginning to below 1000. Afterwards, the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of stores closed rose dramatically and reached its peak at approximately 5000 a year after the
fell
Replace the word
fall
show examples
. The were 5000 shops closed
in
Change the preposition
at
show examples
 the end of the given period after
faced
Wrong verb form
facing
show examples
 a stable state between 2016 and 2017.
Submitted by writingieltsband9 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "downward" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stable" was used 2 times.
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