“Prison is the only truly effective form of punishment, because it separates criminals from society.” To what extent do you support this view? You should give reasons for your answer, and include ideas and examples from your own knowledge and experience.
Some
people
believe that if the crime
is more serious, prison is common
Correct article usage
a common
punishments
. In my opinion, I agree with Fix the agreement mistake
punishment
this
message because created
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creates
confident
Replace the word
confidence
to
Change preposition
in
people
during the
situations and I will explain Correct article usage
apply
this
below.
Nowadays, increasing
Correct article usage
the increasing
offenders
every year cause citizens Correct quantifier usage
number of offenders
concern
Correct subject-verb agreement
concerns
safer
, the Change preposition
about safer
mainly
cause is drug Change the adverb
main
problem
are rising Fix the agreement mistake
problems
while
governments cannot control, Correct word choice
that
for example
, in Thailand, the weeds are delated
from addiction substance lists and reform to medicine in treatments patient that Correct your spelling
deleted
people
can purchase if the shops have licensed to sell, we can see many shops are selling weeds in the cities, at the result some people
that lack of
educated and did not how to right use Remove the preposition
apply
are
Change the verb form
are relied
are relying
rely
addiction and wanted money to buy so, criminal in the communities. Add the preposition
rely on
rely upon
Moreover
, age
of offenders is reducing because children are influenced form violent games with imitate Correct article usage
the age
it
, without Correct pronoun usage
them
Correct article usage
the supervise
supervise
of parents, so not able to Replace the word
supervision
distinguishing
what Wrong verb form
distinguish
virtual
or Add a missing verb
is virtual
no
virtual Correct your spelling
not
thus
, stimulated
child criminals increasingly. so, governments should manage to Wrong verb form
stimulating
problem
children to first priority.
In
Change preposition
On
other
side, offenders should be punished to Correct article usage
the other
deters
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deter
crime
. police must prevent crime
and make communities safer by increasing in number of police officers on the streets, particularly, at the
night. Some criminals pose a threat to society, they should Correct article usage
apply
put
in prison to ensure Add a missing verb
be put
the
safer. Correct your spelling
they
Additionally
, they
another aim of prisoners is Correct pronoun usage
apply
rehabilitation
by receiving education and vocational training to make them better citizens before Add an article
a rehabilitation
leave
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leaving
for
prevent re-offenders.
In conclusion, punishment is Change preposition
to
best
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the best
ways
to Fix the agreement mistake
way
resolved
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resolve
problem
and Fix the agreement mistake
problems
deters
Correct subject-verb agreement
deter
crime
. Nevertheless
, The state should serious
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be serious
to
social Change preposition
about
problem
and review addiction laws before crisis Fix the agreement mistake
problems
situation
in the future.Fix the agreement mistake
situations
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Task Response
Develop a clearer thesis statement in your introduction to directly address the essay topic and clarify your stance on prison as a form of punishment.
Coherence and Cohesion
Organize your essay more effectively with clear paragraphs, each starting with a topic sentence that introduces the main idea of the paragraph.
Coherence and Cohesion
Improve your coherence by ensuring that your ideas flow logically from one to another, using linking words and phrases appropriately.
Task Response
Support your main points with more concrete examples or evidence, ensuring they directly relate to the question prompt.
Task Response
Be sure to restate your thesis and summarize your main points in the conclusion, linking it clearly to the question prompt for a strong finish.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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