The prevention of health problems and illness is more important than treatment and medicine. Government funding should reflect this.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays, many
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

consider that
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

government
Correct article usage
the government

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
have
duty
Add an article
a duty
the duty

The noun phrase duty seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
to help their
civil
Replace the word
citizens

The word civil doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
improving
Wrong verb form
improve

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb improving. Consider changing it.

show examples
their health. In my opinion, I mainly agree with that. On the
one
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

hand,
awarding
Verb problem
encouraging

There may be a verb use issue here.

show examples
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

pay
Fix the infinitive
to pay

It seems that the use of particle to may be incorrect here.

show examples
more attention
in
Change preposition
to

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
health has
it’s
Replace the word
its

It appears that the contraction it’s should be a possessive pronoun instead. Consider changing it.

show examples
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits

It seems that benefit may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
.
People
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

are
majority
Correct article usage
the majority

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
labour of
one
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

region. They can make
hundred
Correct article usage
a hundred

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
billion dollars
annual
Change the word
annually

Annual seems to be the wrong part of speech for this context.

show examples
year. Consuming products in daily life and
pay
Wrong verb form
paying

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb pay. Consider changing it.

show examples
tax
Fix the agreement mistake
taxes

It seems that tax may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
for
Change preposition
to

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

government
Add an article
the government

The noun phrase government seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
.
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

governments have duty to repay
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

back to their national
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. Of course.
One
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

way is
recall
Change the verb form
to recall
recalling

It appears that the linking verb is requires a different form of the verb recall. Consider changing the verb form.

show examples
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

take care
themselves
Change preposition
of themselves

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
through
advertisement
Change the noun form
advertisements

The form of the noun advertisement does not appear to be correct when used before the phrase such as. Consider changing the noun form.

show examples
,
such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as social media, TV shows or
warning
Fix the agreement mistake
warnings

It seems that warning may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
beside the road. It helps
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

government
Correct article usage
the government

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
improving
Wrong verb form
improve

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb improving. Consider changing it.

show examples
the quality of
labours
Fix the agreement mistake
labour

It seems that labours may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
and decreasing the number of
payment
Fix the agreement mistake
payments

It seems that payment may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
in civil welfare. On the opposite, as I mentioned before,
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

government
Add an article
the government

The noun phrase government seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
should take
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

show examples
responsibility
to pay
Change preposition
for paying

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
Change preposition
for human’s
show examples
human’s
Change noun form
human

It seems that this noun form may be incorrect.

show examples
welfare. If there were
large
Change the article
a large

It appears that the phrase large amount does not contain the correct article usage. Consider making a change.

show examples
amount of
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

getting sick,
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

government
Add an article
the government

The noun phrase government seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
will
Wrong verb form
would

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb will. Consider changing it.

show examples
pay considerable money
on
Change preposition
for

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
it. No
one
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

want
Change the verb form
wants

It appears that the indefinite pronoun one does not agree with the verb want in your sentence. Consider changing the form of the verb.

show examples
to get into that situation.
Thus
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, reminding
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

to prevent
from
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
illness will be more effective than
pay
Wrong verb form
paying

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb pay. Consider changing it.

show examples
their bill
of
Change preposition
for

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
treatment, because once someone
go
Change the verb form
goes

It appears that the indefinite pronoun someone does not agree with the verb go in your sentence. Consider changing the form of the verb.

show examples
to hospital,
whatever
Correct word choice
whether

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

show examples
serious or not,
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

government
Correct article usage
the government

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
should spend a part of
money
Add an article
the money

The noun phrase money seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

show examples
, maybe occupied six in ten.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, if someone
got
Verb problem
has

There may be a verb use issue here.

show examples
a headache and went to see a doctor, personally taking $200 and
then
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

government
Correct article usage
the government

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
paying $120 for him or
she
Change the pronoun
her

It appears you have used the subject pronoun she in an objective position. Consider changing it.

show examples
.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it only pays $50
for advertising
Change preposition
to advertise

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
how it is impossible for
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

do
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb do appears to be unnecessary here.

show examples
not
stay
Fix the infinitive
to stay

It seems that the use of particle to may be incorrect here.

show examples
up late, and
then
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it will avoid
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

happened
Wrong verb form
happening

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb happened. Consider changing it.

show examples
. In conclusion, a healthy lifestyle is important for everyone. I mainly agree that
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

government
Correct article usage
the government

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
take
Wrong verb form
should pay

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb take. Consider changing it.

show examples
more attention
in
Change preposition
to

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
the prevention of
healthy
Replace the word
health

The word healthy doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
problems and illness rather than treatment and medicine because it
will
Wrong verb form
would

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb will. Consider changing it.

show examples
be brilliant
that
Correct word choice
if

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

show examples
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

government
Correct article usage
the government

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
could
make
Verb problem
give

There may be a verb use issue here.

show examples
more profits from it.
Submitted by dayowong095 on

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task achievement
Clarify and expand on your main points. Ensure each paragraph presents a clear argument supported by examples or evidence.
coherence and cohesion
Organize your essay more logically. Use clear paragraph transitions and ensure each paragraph flows smoothly into the next.
task achievement
Provide more specific, real-world examples to support your arguments. This will strengthen your case and make your points more convincing.
coherence and cohesion
Revise your introduction and conclusion to more clearly outline your argument and summarize your main points.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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