Few people devote time to hobbies nowadays. Say why you think this is the case and what effect this has on the individual and society in general. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
These days many individuals invest
time
on
their favorite activities from various fields. I think Change preposition
in
main
reason Add an article
the main
of
Change preposition
for
this
is because
Correct word choice
that
people
consider it as a break for themselves from everyday life and it increases their overall
productivity. In addition
, this
practice has great
impact on society in terms of promoting Add an article
a great
healthy
lifestyle and making socializing easier in today's busy lives.
To start with, pursuing hobbies in Add an article
a healthy
every
Correct determiner usage
an
day
schedule develops practices to alleviate stress in Correct your spelling
everyday
significant
manner. Most Change the article
a significant
of
Change preposition
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
people
easily get exhausted with task
and other Fix the agreement mistake
tasks
responsibility
, in these cases, doing what really makes you happy be it for an hour can motivate and charge you for Fix the agreement mistake
responsibilities
next
chapter of life. Correct article usage
the next
For example
- survey
has revealed that 40% of IT field workers prefer to assign some Correct article usage
a survey
time
to their hobbies 2-3 times a week. Secondly
, performances
Fix the agreement mistake
performance
in
any horizon can be increased if Change preposition
on
mind
is more Add an article
the mind
relax
, which could be easily attainable by doing what really excites you in Change the form of the verb
relaxed
spare
Correct pronoun usage
your spare
time
.
In addition
, most of
Change preposition
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
people
counts
Change the verb form
count
sport
as one of their preferred activities to perform. If more Fix the agreement mistake
sports
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
get
indulge Verb problem
apply
into
any kind of physical event, more positive health outcomes can be collected. Change preposition
in
For instance
, TOI published 60
% of athletes tend to follow Correct word choice
that 60
disease free
lifestyles, which proportionally exhibits better Add a hyphen
disease-free
surrounding
for mankind. Replace the word
surroundings
Second
point would be, Change the article
The second
people
tend to socialize more as compared to normal lifeCorrect word choice
that people
,
if in case, they put Remove the comma
apply
efforts
Fix the agreement mistake
effort
to try
out some new interests. Many doings Change preposition
into trying
required
Wrong verb form
require
people
to work together as team
, Add an article
a team
promotes
making new connections, Wrong verb form
promoting
equally
interactive at the same Correct word choice
and equally
time
. All this
can result in friendly
and caring neighborhood.
Correct article usage
a friendly
To conclude
, numerous plus points can be collected by taking out some time
to follow what one really enjoys doing in their lives
Fix the agreement mistake
life
such
as better mental stability and increase in performances
that can Fix the agreement mistake
performance
also
benefit society by making it more
comfortable place to live.Correct article usage
a more
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Task Response
In your essay, ensure to clearly address the prompt. While you provided reasons and effects related to individuals engaging in hobbies, note that the prompt asked for reasons why few people devote time to hobbies nowadays. Revisit the task and ensure your response closely matches the prompt to improve your score in task response.
Coherence and Cohesion
Use a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas more smoothly. This can help with the coherence of your essay. For instance, instead of starting sentences with 'Secondly,' or 'In addition,' try using phrases like 'Moreover,' 'Consequently,' or 'As a result,' where appropriate.
Coherence and Cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, focus on creating a clear paragraph structure with a single main idea supported by examples or explanations. While your essay generally follows this structure, ensuring each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and follows logically from the previous can improve clarity and flow.
The Greeting
Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.
Always start an informal letter in the ways:
- Dear + name
- Hi / Hello + name
‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.
For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:
- Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
- Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.