in many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

#countries #world #people #cities #population #countryside #development

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These days

due to

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some factors society tends to live in the urban

areas

Use synonyms

as a result

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, a significant portion of people who live in villages have decided to leave their rural

areas

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and move into the

cities

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consequently

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, there is a decrease in the quantities of individuals of who lived in rural

areas

Use synonyms

This

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essay will elaborate on both the positive and negative impacts of

this

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phenomenon. On the one hand, there are some beneficial implications in moving from rural

areas

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to the

cities

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. The people who live in urban

areas

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have many more job opportunities,

therefore

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they might be able to find their desired job and would be satisfied with their career.

for example

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, you can set up your own business in the city.

In addition

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to the job opportunities, the students have a great chance to have a high-quality education and study in a prominent school.

Moreover

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, the urban citizens have high-quality facilities including malls, sports centers and shopping centers which improve the condition of living.

On the other hand

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, moving into

cities

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has a significant negative impact, emigrating from the countryside causes reduced population.

This

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incident could lead to a decrease in the number of farmers. Every country needs farmers to produce crops, fruits and rice so life will be difficult without them. Plus, not only

haven’t

Verb problem

does

show examples

people the hustle and bustle of

cities

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, but

also

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has the greenery scenery which makes it the best place to live.

Finally

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, the inhabitants of the countryside have to stay and develop their village. In conclusion, change in the place of living from village to the city has both benefits and negative impacts including providing a better quality of living and education and the lack of farmers in a village . but my point of view is that the advantages of

this

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phenomenon far outweigh the disadvantages.

Submitted by TUTOO on Tue Mar 12 2024

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Task Achievement

To enhance your score in Task Achievement, strive to include more specific examples that directly support your arguments. While general statements are informative, concrete examples add depth and credibility to your essay.

Coherence and Cohesion

For Coherence and Cohesion, ensure a more seamless flow between ideas by improving transitions. Consider phrases that link paragraphs and thoughts more clearly, guiding the reader through your argument's logic with increased fluidity.

Task Achievement

In view of Task Achievement, make sure every paragraph contributes directly to answering the question. This involves not only presenting advantages and disadvantages but also clearly stating your stance and explaining why one outweighs the other with persuasive reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion

To boost Coherence and Cohesion, pay attention to the consistency of your argument. Ensure that your essay maintains a clear stance throughout, with all points reinforcing your main assertion without contradicting it.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

308 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

rural-to-urban migration
population shift
positive impact
negative impact
urbanization
job opportunities
access to education
access to healthcare
urban infrastructure
rural traditions
cultural heritage

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in many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In recent years, the world has witnessed a noticeable decline in interest and participation in traditional forms of art and culture

Being involved in the arts makes people feel better. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Scientists predict in the near future, car will be driven by computers, not people. Why? Do you think it is a positive or negative development

Some people say advertising has positive economic effects. Others think it has negative social effects because it will make people dissatisfied with who they are and what they have. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.