More and more people no longer read newspaper or watch TV programs to get news. They get news about the world through the internet. Is this a positive or negative development?
It is easy to notice that newspapers and TV are no longer
people
's go-to choices when they are wondering about what is happening around the world
. Instead
, internet
has become the major pathway leading Add an article
the internet
people
to global information. While
some think that this
development is favourable, I believe that it also
has downsides.
In my perspective, internet
provides Add an article
the internet
accessable
and interactive Correct your spelling
accessible
service
for Fix the agreement mistake
services
people
by answering to
their requests directly. When Change preposition
apply
people
want to acquire news
, it is more convenient to open up the news
APP installed on the phone,
or search on Google for specific events than purchasing newspapers and looking for Remove the comma
apply
news
, or turning on their TVs to wait for a news
program., as such
conventional methods do not offer news
upon request. Device users may also
browse and post comments while
reading the news
, which allows them to be more engaged and involved in the news
events.
Nevertheless
, such
technology
development often Replace the word
technological
leave
Change the verb form
leaves
people
in information cacoons
, where individuals can only see what they want to see and what they are interested in. Nowadays, big data is capable of analyzing users' Correct your spelling
cocoons
preference
and Fix the agreement mistake
preferences
feed
them posts that suit their taste, in order to keep their attention and make them stay. Wrong verb form
feeding
Such
functions restrict people
from critically seeing the world
with
all aspects. Change preposition
in
For example
, people
who follow lots of celebrities on social media may only see entertainment news
, and scholars who recently did literature
review via Correct article usage
a literature
Add an article
the internet
internet
may be fed with academic Capitalize word
Internet
news
intensively. They may assume the content they saw is the most popular news
. Therefore
, using internet
as a tool to acquire Add an article
the internet
news
may limit people
's dialetical
view of the Correct your spelling
dialectical
world
.
To conclude
, while
internet
provides Add an article
the internet
convenient
and interactive experience to modern readers who get Add an article
a convenient
news
online, it limits their perspectives and reserves parts of the whole world
, which may affect their world
value in the long run.Submitted by lizixuan555 on
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Structure
Ensure you have a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. Introduce the topic and your viewpoint in the introduction, use the body paragraphs to support your argument with examples or evidence, and summarize your argument in the conclusion.
Content
Work on developing your arguments by providing more detailed examples. Using specific instances can enhance your argument's persuasiveness and relevance.
Coherence and Cohesion
Improve coherence and cohesion by using a wider range of linking devices. Effective use of connectors such as 'however', 'moreover', and 'therefore' can help the flow of your essay and make your argument clearer.
Coherence
Pay attention to the smoothness of transitions between paragraphs. Each paragraph should connect logically to the next, with clear topic sentences that introduce the main idea of each paragraph.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example