More and more people no longer read newspaper or watch TV programs to get news. They get news about the world through the internet. Is this a positive or negative development?

It is easy to notice that newspapers and TV are no longer
people
's go-to choices when they are wondering about what is happening around the
world
.
Instead
,
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
has become the major pathway leading
people
to global information.
While
some think that
this
development is favourable, I believe that it
also
has downsides. In my perspective,
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
provides
accessable
Correct your spelling
accessible
and interactive
service
Fix the agreement mistake
services
show examples
for
people
by answering
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their requests directly. When
people
want to acquire
news
, it is more convenient to open up the
news
APP installed on the phone
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
or search on Google for specific events than purchasing newspapers and looking for
news
, or turning on their TVs to wait for a
news
program., as
such
conventional methods do not offer
news
upon request. Device users may
also
browse and post comments
while
reading the
news
, which allows them to be more engaged and involved in the
news
events.
Nevertheless
,
such
technology
Replace the word
technological
show examples
development often
leave
Change the verb form
leaves
show examples
people
in information
cacoons
Correct your spelling
cocoons
show examples
, where individuals can only see what they want to see and what they are interested in. Nowadays, big data is capable of analyzing users'
preference
Fix the agreement mistake
preferences
show examples
and
feed
Wrong verb form
feeding
show examples
them posts that suit their taste, in order to keep their attention and make them stay.
Such
functions restrict
people
from critically seeing the
world
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
all aspects.
For example
,
people
who follow lots of celebrities on social media may only see entertainment
news
, and scholars who recently did
literature
Correct article usage
a literature
show examples
review via
Add an article
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
may be fed with academic
news
intensively. They may assume the content they saw is the most popular
news
.
Therefore
, using
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
as a tool to acquire
news
may limit
people
's
dialetical
Correct your spelling
dialectical
view of the
world
.
To conclude
,
while
internet
Add an article
the internet
show examples
provides
convenient
Add an article
a convenient
show examples
and interactive experience to modern readers who get
news
online, it limits their perspectives and reserves parts of the whole
world
, which may affect their
world
value in the long run.
Submitted by lizixuan555 on

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Structure
Ensure you have a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. Introduce the topic and your viewpoint in the introduction, use the body paragraphs to support your argument with examples or evidence, and summarize your argument in the conclusion.
Content
Work on developing your arguments by providing more detailed examples. Using specific instances can enhance your argument's persuasiveness and relevance.
Coherence and Cohesion
Improve coherence and cohesion by using a wider range of linking devices. Effective use of connectors such as 'however', 'moreover', and 'therefore' can help the flow of your essay and make your argument clearer.
Coherence
Pay attention to the smoothness of transitions between paragraphs. Each paragraph should connect logically to the next, with clear topic sentences that introduce the main idea of each paragraph.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Accessibility
  • Democratizes access to information
  • Real-time updates
  • Misinformation
  • Diverse range of sources
  • Multiple perspectives
  • Critical thinking
  • Reinforce biases
  • Information overload
  • Decline of traditional media
  • Innovation and adaptation
  • Interactive forms of news consumption
  • Engagement
  • Echo chambers
  • Unverified information
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