Some people see sport as no more than a leisure activity, others, however, believe that it is important for society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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From the ancient Roman Empire to the modern
society
Use synonyms
,
sports
Use synonyms
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
been a part of the human history. It has witnessed
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
civilization and it has developed into different levels with the aid of technology. In modern
society
Use synonyms
, most people play
sports
Use synonyms
as a
past-time
Correct your spelling
pastime
show examples
activity. Statistics and papers demonstrated that the hustle and bustle lifestyle nowadays has led to a surge in
psychologcal
Correct your spelling
psychological
illness globally,
for example
Linking Words
, depression. Participating in
sports
Use synonyms
can produce endorphins which is essential in creating
thrust
Correct article usage
a thrust
show examples
of
excitment
Correct your spelling
excitement
and positive emotions. Many corporations
encourages
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encourage
show examples
employees to
participates
Wrong verb form
participate
show examples
in
sports
Use synonyms
like yoga during lunch hour aiming to ease stress and to maintain a work-life balance.
Nonetheless
Linking Words
,
sports
Use synonyms
helps shapes characters in personal growth like
perserverance
Correct your spelling
perseverance
and stamina in
adversed
Correct your spelling
adverse
situations.
With
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Without
show examples
no
Correct determiner usage
a
show examples
doubt,
sports
Use synonyms
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
bring
Change the verb form
brought
show examples
significant positive impacts
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
people in personal growth as a leisure activity.
However
Linking Words
,
sports
Use synonyms
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
also
Linking Words
posed
Verb problem
had
show examples
a great impact
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
Use synonyms
. when we look into
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
bigger picture. The first
Olympics
Fix the agreement mistake
Olympic
show examples
Games
Use synonyms
was held by the Great Alexander during the times of
Roman
Correct article usage
the Roman
show examples
Empire. At
first,
Linking Words
only male Greeks were allowed to join the
games
Use synonyms
as competitors yet later females and
foerigners
Correct your spelling
foreigners
were
also
Linking Words
welcomed to participate. Nowadays, competitors from countries all over the globe and with different religious
background
Fix the agreement mistake
backgrounds
show examples
are all welcomed. Cultural exchanges are greatly promoted.
Besides
Linking Words
, there is a significant
postiive
Correct your spelling
positive
financial impact
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
Use synonyms
. Swamps of tourists visit the countries who held
Correct article usage
the Olympics
show examples
Olympics
Fix the agreement mistake
Olympic
show examples
Games
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once
ever
Correct your spelling
every
show examples
four years and
this
Linking Words
is certainly
a great news
Remove the article
great news
a piece of great news
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
the local catering and hotel industries and tourist attractions.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the building of recreational
landuse
Correct your spelling
land use
like
sports
Use synonyms
complexes promotes the infrastructural
developement
Correct your spelling
development
. Paraolympics
Games
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
eliminates
Correct subject-verb agreement
eliminate
show examples
discrimnation
Correct your spelling
discrimination
and
enhances
Correct subject-verb agreement
enhance
show examples
equality in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society
Use synonyms
.
Sports
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promotes
Change the verb form
promote
show examples
personal psychological and
psysical
Correct your spelling
physical
growth in individuals yet
sports
Use synonyms
promotes harmony and sportsmanship which are the key to
succeed
Replace the word
success
show examples
and prosperity in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
modern
society
Use synonyms
in
long
Correct article usage
the long
show examples
run.
Submitted by leungkafukathy on

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Task Achievement
Ensure you have a clear introduction and conclusion that specifically address the task question and clearly present your opinion.
Coherence & Cohesion
To improve clarity and coherence, work on connecting your ideas more clearly using transition phrases. For example, when moving from personal benefits to societal benefits of sports, a sentence like 'While the individual benefits of sports are clear, it also holds significant societal advantages.' can bridge the sections smoothly.
Task Achievement
Use real-world examples to support your main points further. While you've touched upon the Olympics and its impact, delve deeper into how these events foster cultural exchanges and economic benefits, drawing from specific instances or data.
Coherence & Cohesion
Review your essay for any grammatical or spelling errors to enhance its overall readability. Although your essay is largely understandable, polishing language and punctuation can help express your ideas more clearly.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Leisure activity
  • Physical fitness
  • Well-being
  • Stress management
  • Relaxation
  • Community
  • Social cohesion
  • Values
  • Skills
  • National identity
  • Pride
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