In many countries, people are moving away from rural areas and towards urban areas. Why do you think that is? What problems can this cause?

It is true that advances in the realm of urban

areas

Use synonyms

Change the verb form

are

show examples

better than

rural

Change preposition

in rural

show examples

areas

Use synonyms

Therefore

Linking Words

, the majority of

people

Use synonyms

prefer to reside in town in recent years. The main problem may lie in

strain

Add an article

a strain

the strain

show examples

infrastructure

Use synonyms

and

health

Use synonyms

problems

Use synonyms

To begin

Linking Words

with,

increase

Correct article usage

an increase

show examples

in the level of

people

Use synonyms

in urban

areas

Use synonyms

can seriously jeopardize the environment.

This

Linking Words

is because, as more

people

Use synonyms

move into cities, the demand for housing, transportation and

utilize

Replace the word

utilisation

show examples

increases, often

capacity

Add an article

the capacity

show examples

of existing systems.

This

Linking Words

can lead to overcrowding and

shortage

Correct article usage

a shortage

show examples

of resources like water and electricity. In order to mitigate

this

Linking Words

concern, individuals should reduce their impact on

infrastructure

Use synonyms

. They can use public transportation

instead

Linking Words

of driving alone, or they can reduce energy consumption by using energy-efficient appliances and turning off lights when not in use. In doing so, individuals can contribute to the

overall

Linking Words

effort to reduce the strain of urban

infrastructure

Use synonyms

caused by overpopulation.

Moreover

Linking Words

, another worrying aspect of the uprise of

people

Use synonyms

in urban

area

Fix the agreement mistake

areas

show examples

health

Use synonyms

issues.

In other

Linking Words

words

Add a comma

words,

show examples

overcrowding and pollution can lead to

health

Use synonyms

problems

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as respiratory

problems

Use synonyms

and increased risk of disease outbreaks. To illustrate, in cities with high levels of traffic and industrial

emissions

Add a comma

emissions,

show examples

residents may be exposed to harmful pollutants that can cause respiratory conditions. Addressing

this

Linking Words

issue involves mass media shouldering the responsibility to reduce air pollution

such

Linking Words

as promoting the use of public transportation.

To conclude

Linking Words

, living in urban

areas

Use synonyms

can lead to numerous

problems

Use synonyms

. Two main dangers of

this

Linking Words

switch can be strain

Change preposition

show examples

infrastructure

Use synonyms

and

health

Use synonyms

problems

Use synonyms

which should be minimized by

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

and mass media.

g4832525

Mar 13, 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

A more thorough introduction to the topic, including a clear thesis statement, would enhance the clarity and effectiveness of your essay.

task achievement

Elaborate your ideas more comprehensively by providing more detailed examples and explaining how these examples support your points.

coherence cohesion

Work on creating a logical flow of ideas by using transitional phrases and ensuring that each paragraph clearly supports your main argument.

coherence cohesion

Your conclusion should more clearly summarize the main points discussed in the essay and restate your thesis in light of the evidence provided.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

268 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

8
band
These days many people leave their country to work abroad and take their family with them. Do you think benefits of this outways disadvantages in family developement.
Nowadays there is an ongoing debate about the advantages and disadvantages of people travelling overseas with their family to work. This essay will delve further into this issue and clearly delineate that certainly there are more advantages rather than disadvantages if people move away from their country of origin to work abroad.
7.5
band
Experts say if the old people spend time and get along with others and exercise everyday will be healthier and happier. However, many elderlies are suffering from loneliness and lack of fitness. Discuss the cause and solution.
In recent days, many seniors have undergone a sense of isolation and do not work out adequately. According to experts, elderly people should live harmoniously in neighbourhoods and exercise on a daily basis to avoid the degradation of both mental and physical health. Although there are several causes of this alarming trend, measures could certainly be taken to tackle the problems.
6
band
Some people think that in the modern world we are more dependent on each orther. Others argue that people have become more independent. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
This essay discusses two different perspectives on the dependency of people in the modern world which is influenced by modern technologies and innovation. The writer tries to present both views and elaborate based on a personal point of view.
7
band
In many countries governments are investing in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?
In recent years, it has been common for the globe to invest heavily in modern technology to bring benefits to residents from all countries. The writer believes that this is a proper use of that money for technology as it provides accessibility to public services and the simplification of administrative processes.
7
band
Earlier technology developments brought more benefits and changed the lives of ordinary people more than recent developments ever will. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Some assert that preceding technological advancements yielded more substantial benefits and transformations in the lives of common people in contrast to contemporary innovations. I completely disagree with the notion as recent breakthroughs possess an equivalent, if not superior, potential to reconfigure lives and societies, challenging the notion of diminishing impact.

In many countries, people are moving away from rural areas and towards urban areas. Why do you think that is? What problems can this cause?

These days many people leave their country to work abroad and take their family with them. Do you think benefits of this outways disadvantages in family developement.

Experts say if the old people spend time and get along with others and exercise everyday will be healthier and happier. However, many elderlies are suffering from loneliness and lack of fitness. Discuss the cause and solution.

Some people think that in the modern world we are more dependent on each orther. Others argue that people have become more independent. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In many countries governments are investing in new technology to deal with the public. Why is this happening? Do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?

Earlier technology developments brought more benefits and changed the lives of ordinary people more than recent developments ever will. To what extent do you agree or disagree?