Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attraction. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

There is a different contention regarding the amount of money that should be paid by foreigners if they visit some tourist objects. Some argue that they have to pay more than the locals even though they see the same attraction. As for me, I disagree with the idea of higher prices for foreign travellers and a
further
explanation will be presented in
this
essay.
Firstly
, the governments are the main actors behind the tourism ticketing rules. It is understandable that they will formulate some beneficial policies to push economic growth because they hope as the
price
soars, the regional income will rise too.
For example
, a cultural performance called Ramayana Ballet is demonstrated in Prambanan Temple, and the entrance ticket
price
for the show is set to be more expensive for those who come from overseas.
This
seems not fair for foreigners because they see the same show without any particular services or facilities and yet they have to pay more than locals. It will always be unfair unless they are given some special treatment which is worth the
price
. Meanwhile, if the tariff is set lower, I strongly believe that foreign tourists are more fascinated to visit.
As a result
, the regional income tends to be much higher than before since it will
also
give spillover effects to the retailers surrounding the objects.
For instance
, there will be a lot of souvenir sellers outside the spots.
This
is way more promising and should be taken into consideration if governments want to renew the policy.
Finally
, setting unreasonable prices for foreign visitors is not a good choice.
Instead
of being attracted to come, they possibly choose other places which are cheaper. So, it is better to make the
price
lower.
Submitted by srsdy008 on

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Task Achievement
For task response, ensure that all parts of the task are answered. You've discussed why you disagree with higher prices for foreign visitors, which is good. However, consider providing a more direct response to the statement and explicitly state whether you fully or partially agree or disagree. Adding a counter-argument before refuting it could also strengthen your position.
Coherence and Cohesion
To further improve clarity and the presentation of ideas, consider varying your sentence structure and implementing more sophisticated conjunctions. This will enhance the flow of your essay and make your argument more compelling.
Task Achievement
Make sure your main points are well-supported with detailed examples or evidence. While you've given some examples, providing more specific data or a broader range of examples could bolster your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on developing a clear topic sentence for each paragraph that outlines the main idea you will discuss. This will help with the logical structure and coherence of your essay.
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