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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Many people in community now buy consumer goods being cheaper, whether the advantages outweigh the disadantages?

#people #community #consumer #goods #disadantages
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In
this
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 day and age the growth of manufacture can open new opportunities for trading the phenomenon of inexpensive
goods
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 is ubiquitous
due to
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 the fact that it has a number of merits. Some
people
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 argue its demerits first.
However
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, in my
further
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 paragraph , both advantages and disadvantages of it will be discussed
accordingly
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 and I personally believe that the amenities can overweight its drawbacks. To commence with the benefits, the first and foremost key one is that consumer items being cheaper creates a great way to boost the economy in certain places.
For instance
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, in the
last
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 few decades, China has exceeded the country’s outcome many times more than in previous periods by producing cheaper products.
As a result
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, meantime China has become the dominant country in exporting
goods
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 to other parts of the world. Another benefit which can strike the minds of the
people
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 is creating conveniences for individuals. To cite an example, The more affordable household appliances which can make house chores easy and quick, the more human beings have to save quality time.
As a consequence
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, they can be capable of spending their day with their family considerably. On its darker side, one of the disadvantages which can make it problematic is that there is a detrimental effect on the environment. Affordable items cause the demand for the consuming products contributing a noticeable effect being the landfill on the surface of the Earth full of rubbish. And it can increase global warming .
Furthermore
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, more and more
people
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 have appreciated that the capability to purchase
goods
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 at lower prices can lead to the family's financial burden as households can buy everything which is unnecessary . In conclusion, what has been discussed above, neither its pros nor cons can be neglected. Yet, the advantages of cheaper
goods
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 on boosting the economy and conveniences for
people
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 dominate definitely in spite of the fact that there may be an obvious hazardous danger to the environmental atmosphere.
Submitted by nazirovmuhammad71 on

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task achievement
Ensure you directly address the question posed in the essay prompt in your introduction. While you've outlined that you will discuss both advantages and disadvantages, stating your opinion directly at the beginning would offer clearer guidance to the reader on your standpoint.
task achievement
Try to include more specific examples to support your arguments. While you've provided general instances, more detailed examples would strengthen your arguments and provide clearer evidence for your claims.
coherence cohesion
Maintain logical organization throughout the essay by clearly separating your paragraphs based on the points discussed. Using transitional phrases between paragraphs can further improve the flow of your essay.
coherence cohesion
Be careful with your use of articles and prepositions, as some mistakes were noticed. Reviewing these areas will improve the fluency and accuracy of your writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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