Some people thinks that certain prisoners should be made to do unpaid community work instead of being put behind bars. To what extent do you agree.
With the rising rates of
crime
in today's contemporary era, people have diverse opinion
over handling accused and guilty Fix the agreement mistake
opinions
person
of a particular Fix the agreement mistake
persons
crime
. Proponents believe that,
prisoners are not safe for the community if they come outside the prison. Remove the comma
apply
Hence
they should remain locked in prision
. Correct your spelling
prison
However
, advocates for human rights and humanity thinks
that they should get a second chance depending on the seriousness of the Correct subject-verb agreement
think
crime
. This
essay will discuss both viewpoints.
To begin
with, society is often afraid of having a guilty person
around them and saftey
is Correct your spelling
safety
utmost
priority for them. Add an article
the utmost
an utmost
Due to
that, they think it is not safe for the families, and especially for childrens
. Having Correct your spelling
children
alleged
Correct article usage
an alleged
person
or criminal freely roam around in the neighbourhood can potentially harm to
other people. Change preposition
apply
Which
makes people mentally Correct pronoun usage
This
omnious
and always worried about Correct your spelling
ominous
individual's
protection with possible threats by Change noun form
individual
Add an article
the prisoner
a prisoner
prisoner
.
Fix the agreement mistake
prisoners
On the other hand
, many folks are willing to give a second chance to the prisoners. They thinks
that minor Change the verb form
think
mistakes
and crimes should not be handled by putting accused behind the bars. As it can lead to mental breakdown, strees
, depression, and anxiety to them. To avoid these, we should always consider the factor of humanity and Correct your spelling
stress
government
should take necessary steps to help them in clearing terrible Correct article usage
the government
mistakes
they have made in past. For minor Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
crime
we administration should tackle Add a comma
crime,
individual
by assigning community work. By that, it is indirectly helping Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
accused
to Correct article usage
the accused
becomes
Wrong verb form
become
kind hearted
Add a hyphen
kind-hearted
person
and never step into the world of crime
again. Example
of Correct article usage
An example
small
Correct article usage
a small
mistakes
would be, somebody Fix the agreement mistake
mistake
is
stealing food to feed their family as they are below Unnecessary verb
apply
poverty
line and cannot Add an article
the poverty
afford
.
In conclusion, I believe that, with careful consideration of Correct pronoun usage
afford it
negligable
crimes, some of the guilty accused should be given Correct your spelling
negligible
opportunity
to clear Add an article
the opportunity
an opportunity
their
Change the word
the
mistakes
they have done
in past.Verb problem
made
Submitted by jimipatel707 on
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Task Achievement
To enhance your task response, it's crucial to directly address the essay prompt by clearly stating your position on the issue. Ensure your introduction includes a thesis statement that reflects your stance. Strengthen your argument by developing well-rounded discussions in your body paragraphs, directly relating them to the question asked.
Coherence and Cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, focus on creating a more structured and logical flow of ideas. Begin with a clear topic sentence in each body paragraph, followed by specific examples and a concluding sentence that ties the paragraph's main idea back to your overall argument. Use transitional phrases to link your ideas smoothly and maintain a coherent thread throughout your essay.
Task Achievement
In your essay, while you've included relevant examples, aim for more specificity and detail to deeply illustrate your points. Utilize real-world scenarios or hypothetical situations that directly support your argument, making sure they clearly align with the topic at hand.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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