Some people think computer games have negative impacts on children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Online
games
have been extremely popular among
children
in recent years. It is argued that the detrimental impacts of
computer
games
on kids are considerably huge.
However
, others consider that there are positive sides to playing
games
. On the one hand, there are several benefits of being engaged in
computer
games
.
Firstly
, young
people
can enhance cognitive and problem-solving skills as they play puzzle
games
.
That is
because
such
games
aid youngsters in possessing strong concentration and solving thought-provoking issues by giving them challenging tasks during the
games
.
Secondly
, playing online
games
would be a great opportunity for kids to be surrounded by like-minded
people
.
In other words
, they can make a kind of friends who have a lot in common.
Children
can interact with players in the form of audio chats and comments in
computer
games
and they are even able to learn foreign languages.
On the other hand
, it is certainly true that there are harmful effects of playing
games
on young
people
. No one can deny that
computer
games
are addictive and
children
can easily be captivated by them.
As a result
,
this
leads to a waste of time and kids may take away their study and essential activities
due to
overindulgence in
games
. Another negative side of playing
games
is health-related problems. The more
games
children
play, the more sedentary lifestyle they develop.
Consequently
,
such
a lifestyle invites many physical issues. In fact, one of the chief reasons for obesity is playing
computer
games
excessively because
children
are often glued to coaches and do fewer activities as they are playing online
games
. In summary,
although
there are lots of benefits of playing
games
for young
people
such
as developing reasoning skills and making friends, some negative consequences like over-dependencies and physical issues exist as well. I strongly believe that it would be acceptable if
children
played
computer
games
in moderation.
Submitted by saydusmonovasomiddin94 on

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Response Completeness
Ensure your thesis statement is clear in expressing your position. Although you've presented both sides, your personal stance should be clearer. It will help the reader understand your perspective from the beginning.
Specific Examples
Provide more specific examples to support your claims. While you've mentioned benefits and downsides of playing computer games, incorporating real-world examples or studies will strengthen your argument.
Logical Structure
Make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and the sentences flow logically from one to the next. Using transition words can help improve the flow of your essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
When discussing contrasting views or aspects of an issue, use clear transition phrases to distinguish between your discussion of opposing views. This helps to clarify your argument and maintain coherence.

Your opinion

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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