Schools should prepare students for the labour market and not waste tme and resources on theoretcal knowledge. Do you agree or disagree?

Education
Plays a crucial role in society. Some Say that
Schools
Should teach
pupile
Correct your spelling
pupils
pupil
for
workplace
Correct article usage
the workplace
show examples
instead
of teaching theoretical-based
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
education
. I Partically agree with
this
statement and a
further
explanation will be presented in
this
essay. To Commence with, educational
institution
Fix the agreement mistake
institutions
show examples
Should Prepare
Students
for work rather than teaching
theory
because these days,
job
Correct article usage
the job
show examples
market's requirements are
Candidate
Fix the agreement mistake
Candidates
show examples
should know
the
Correct word choice
and the
show examples
practical experience in order to companies do not
waste
Fix the infinitive
to waste
show examples
their time and resources
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
providing training.
For example
, western countries are
focus
Wrong verb form
focused
show examples
on practical-based
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
education
, and
as a result
,
their's
Change noun form
their
show examples
students
can get employment after finishing courses. Needless to say,
Students
end of the day enter in the
work place
Correct your spelling
workplace
show examples
, so
schools
should focus based on learning methods rather than
theory
and it will
brings
Change the verb form
bring
show examples
plenty of benefits to
students
. on practical
In Contrast
, Providing only practical-based on
education
besides
theory
cannot succeed
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
Student's
Change noun form
students'
show examples
future, especially
working place
Verb problem
in the workplace,
show examples
because a quality of
education
Should need
Wrong verb form
should be
show examples
practical
as well as
theory
otherwise
pupils have half
knowledge
Correct article usage
the knowledge
show examples
in their Stream.
For instance
, Some professional Courses Should need
theory
in order to learners get full Studies
Such
as law
Subject
Fix the agreement mistake
Subjects
show examples
. To be more precise, Pupils must learn
theory
in
Schools
,
therefore
, they have a chance to understand and know about the basic knowledge.
Hence
, Studying
theory
is not a waste of time and resources. In conclusion, learning
practical
Correct your spelling
practical-based
besed
Correct your spelling
based
on
education
can assist learners when
enter in
Wrong verb form
entering
show examples
the
work
Capitalize word
Work
show examples
Place. Studying
theory
in
Schools
is not a waste of time because it brings
rumerous
Correct your spelling
numerous
benefits to pupils Hereby, I partially agree with
this
statement here Practical and
theory
both are needed. I hope
the
Correct your spelling
this
show examples
brings numerous benefits to Society.
Submitted by reanudeepan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Structure & Organization
Firstly, work on improving the structure of your essay. Begin with a clear introduction that presents your stance clearly. Then, organize your body paragraphs by discussing one main idea per paragraph with relevant examples. Finally, conclude by summarizing your viewpoint concisely.
Coherence & Cohesion
Improve coherence by ensuring that your ideas flow logically from one paragraph to the other. You can achieve this by using cohesive devices (linking words) appropriately, like 'however', 'for instance', and 'therefore'. This will make your essay more readable and coherent.
Task Achievement
To enhance task achievement, ensure that you address all parts of the task question comprehensively. Present clear and detailed reasons for your viewpoint. Including more specific examples to support your arguments will also help strengthen your essay.
Grammar & Vocabulary
Focus on proofreading your essay to correct grammatical errors and improve word choice. Consistency in tenses, proper use of capitalization, and correcting misplaced modifiers can greatly enhance the clarity and professionalism of your writing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: