The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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It is commonly known that
science
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is helpful in improving human
life
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in various fields. The
development
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of technologies not only brings
people
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convenience but
also
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helps
people
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live more effectively in a number of situations,
such
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as working and
traveling
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travelling
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to their lives.
On the other hand
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, the
development
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of technologies
also
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influences adverse aspects
such
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as war and environmental pollution. Some
people
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assert that the most imperative aim of
science
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should be to enhance human being's
life
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. I support that opinion. I will introduce some reasons why I think that.
First,
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I believe that the
development
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of technology comes from the desire to tackle the uncomfortable parts of
life
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.
For example
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, the
airplane
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aeroplane
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was made by a person who would like to go abroad. Aside from that,
people
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who want to relax in the car
while
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driving make a free-driving car. The
science
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was developed by the desire of humans who want to make something change or create original things.
Although
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the environment was destroyed or it caused some problems between the countries, all the aims of starting studying were for human beings. Some
people
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strongly oppose the developments because of their adverse aspects.
However
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, I think if
people
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do not abuse technology skills, improvements in
life
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through the
development
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of
science
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a motivate them to live. When some
people
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do not satisfy current systems, they look forward to enhancing some days. I believe
science
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should be the exit for the next generations. It is our task to live on earth. In conclusion, I believe that the most critical aim of
science
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should be to improve
people
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's
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life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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.
Submitted by heoeunsae on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
For a higher coherence and cohesion score, work on introducing your essay with a more robust thesis statement and conclude it by summarizing your main ideas coherently.
task achievement
To excel in task achievement, ensure you fully address the prompt by discussing both the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and providing a more balanced discussion if applicable.
task achievement
Increase the clarity and comprehensiveness of your ideas by developing your arguments further and providing more detailed examples or evidence to support your views. This will significantly enhance your task achievement score.
general
Incorporate a wider variety of sentence structures and vocabulary to enhance the readability and sophistication of your essay. This will not only improve your score in coherence and cohesion but also in task achievement.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • technological advancements
  • medical discoveries
  • life-changing inventions
  • innovations
  • solutions to human problems
  • enhancing quality of life
  • improvement of healthcare
  • transportation
  • communication
  • agriculture
  • energy sectors
  • eradication of diseases
  • prolongation of life expectancy
  • global challenges
  • climate change
  • overpopulation
  • food security
  • developed world
  • underprivileged communities
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