Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities.Others however say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required discuss both these views and give your own opinion

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As more and more people are putting their personal
health
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
a more important position than before, how to enhance public
health
has become a question surrounded by intensive debate. Some advocate that increasing the amount of
publicport
Correct your spelling
public port
facilities
can address
this
problem most effectively,
while
others argue that
this
measure is inadequate, and many other methods are needed. In my opinion, the number of public exercise
equipments
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equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
show examples
is the key
of
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to
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this
problem,
therefore
the increase of them would be the best solution to the public
health
issue.
Firstly
, the group which would
be benefited
Wrong verb form
benefit
show examples
most from the increase
of
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in
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sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
facilities
is those who would like to engage in exercise, but were impeded by the lack of fields and
equipments
Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
show examples
. The addition of apparus will facilitate them in amusing themselves by doing
sports
,
instead
of other activities
may
Correct pronoun usage
that may
show examples
cause perennial harm to their
health
, like playing video games.
For instance
, most
of
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apply
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students have
the
Correct article usage
a
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strong
willing
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willingness
show examples
to play
sports
such
as basketball and soccer, but they may be compelled to choose other activities because of the lack of courts.
Additionally
, individuals who are not interested in
sports
may be attracted by the handy
appratus
Correct your spelling
apparatus
,
Correct word choice
and, therefore
show examples
therefore
become open-minded in trying them. Evidently, increasing the quantity of
sport
Change the noun form
sports
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facilities
is associated with the elevation of
sports
participator
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participation
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.
Dessidents
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Dissidents
for
this
view may argue that increasing
facilities
solely is not helpful enough. Encouraging people who were used to indoor recreation,
such
as
chesses
Change the wording
chess
games of chess
show examples
and card games to take part in
sports
is challenging,
while
if citizens are not willing to do
sports
, governments cannot
coerse
Correct your spelling
coerce
them to do so. Improving the medical level and treatment quality may be pivotal as well
,
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apply
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because
healthy
Replace the word
health
show examples
problems often stem from improper treatments.
Last
but not least government should teach
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
to be aware of their body situation,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
ignorance of personal
health
can often result in awful
deseases
Correct your spelling
diseases
. In conclusion,
addition
Add an article
the addition
show examples
of public
sports
facilities
may be the best solution to public
health
problems.
But
Correct word choice
However
show examples
it is better to implement
this
strategy
along with
other measures,
such
as medical improvement and healthy education.
Submitted by 13044387123 on

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structure
Ensure your introduction sets up the essay question clearly and provides a brief outline of your argument. In your conclusion, succinctly summarize your points to reinforce your stance.
coherence
To improve coherence, strive for a smooth flow of ideas by using effective transitions between paragraphs and sentences. This creates a stronger, more persuasive argument.
examples
Back up your main points with more specific, real-world examples. This provides concrete evidence to support your arguments, making your essay more convincing.
task response
Address each part of the essay task directly. Make sure your opinion is explicit and your discussion covers all aspects of the prompt. Engaging with all parts of the question demonstrates a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • public health
  • sports facilities
  • physical activity
  • exercise
  • chronic diseases
  • heart disease
  • obesity
  • inclusivity
  • participation
  • safe environment
  • social interaction
  • community engagement
  • comprehensive approach
  • health education programs
  • environmental factors
  • healthcare infrastructure
  • quality healthcare services
  • public health initiatives
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