Some people think that it's important to spend a lot of money on family celebration (e.g. weddings, birthdays). But some people say that expensive celebrations are a waste of money. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

#people #money #celebration #e #g #weddings #birthdays #celebrations #waste

In the past and nowadays many

people

spend a huge of

money

to celebrate a relaxing day. It is bring about working hard. By all means, every country has

this

type of

people

. Even though some

people

think

that is

a to give a thrill On the one hand,there are several benefits to celebrate ,

for example

:weddings, birthdays and others.

This

even gives the person unforgettable moments in their life.

Moreover

, these

people

found a lot of

money

. And their finance incredibly good situation

due to

they are celebrating every month. In many parts of the world have to die for

people

which they are doesn't feel sorry for their families. They are working to make your children happy . They spend an extensive period of time celebrating with their lovely

people

On the other hand

, have other types of greedy

people

. They allocate their cash in another place.

However

, it is not a bad way to increase to financial situation. They tend to earn

money

strong. They never saw health-related problems and worked hard.

Furthermore

, in their view spending huge of

money

to celebrate the special day, does not play a crucial role in their life. And they take care of the family. To summarize, in my opinion, not all humans celebrate because they are spending

money

wisely. I respected

this

person

people

because their families relied on them.

Submitted by saydusmonovasomiddin94 on Sat Mar 16 2024

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Introduction clarity

Start by giving a clear introduction that presents the topic and previews your stance or the points you will discuss. This sets the context for your essay and engages the reader.

Logical structure

Ensure your essay has a logical structure with clear paragraphs - one for the introduction, at least two for the body discussing different views, and one for the conclusion. This makes it easier for readers to follow your argument.

Use of examples

Back up your points with specific examples or more detailed explanations. This helps to strengthen your argument and make it more convincing to the reader.

Cohesion between ideas

Work on transitioning smoothly between ideas and paragraphs with linking phrases. Cohesive devices help to connect your ideas and direct the reader through your argument.

Clear conclusion

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Grammatical Accuracy

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

230 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that it's important to spend a lot of money on family celebration (e.g. weddings, birthdays). But some people say that expensive celebrations are a waste of money. Discuss both views and give your opinion?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to slove them?

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Some people think that it is better for a country’s economy for people to spend money while others believe that it would be better for people to save money. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Countries with along average working time are more economically successful than those countries which do not have a long working time. To what extent do you agree or disagree

some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some infomation is too important or too valueable to be shared freely.