some children spend hours every on smartphones. Why is this case? Is it a positive or negative development?

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In the modern era, technological advancements, especially
smartphones
, have become an
intergral
Correct your spelling
integral
part
in
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of
show examples
our lives. There are numerous reasons why
children
spend
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
majority of their lifetime using these high-tech gadgets
such
as the attractive contents
comprised
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apply
show examples
inside them
as well as
the paucity of parental care towards their kids. From the writer's experience, I think
this
trend
lead
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leads
show examples
to a detrimental impact on their health
also
social lives. When it comes to the culprit of
this
young-age related
Add a hyphen
young-age-related
show examples
addiction, social platforms and gaming
app
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apps
show examples
must be mentioned. To explain it
further
, mobile phones in the current years are packed with differential appealing apps
such
as Facebook,
Tiktok
Correct your spelling
TikTok
show examples
or Instagram compared to the basic functions equipped in like calling or texting in the
last
few decades.
As a result
, the sophisticated artificial intelligence applied by the handsets's inventors will allow the users to approach the latest staggering but equally interesting news. With the same token, the
children
who seem to have
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
intellectual curiosity would certainly be grabbed attention
as well as
kept hooked for a long period of time. Lacking the indispensible care from parents is
also
considered as one of the prime causes of
this
phenomenom
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phenomenon
. Particularly, once nuturers are
stucked
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stuck
stocked
with their business and
could not
Wrong verb form
cannot
show examples
spend enough quality time
for
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with
show examples
their kids, they
would
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apply
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have
tendency
Add an article
a tendency
the tendency
show examples
to make use of
smartphones
as an optimum recreational
facilities
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facility
show examples
offered
their
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to their
show examples
children
.
However
,
this
could pose
a
Change the article
an
show examples
inevitable temptation
on
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for
show examples
teenagers which will
arise
Verb problem
create
show examples
a wide range of negative effects on
themself
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
if they deeply
immerse
Wrong verb form
immersed
show examples
on
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in
show examples
these high-tech devices in the long run. To
examplify
Correct your spelling
exemplify
, a
recenr
Correct your spelling
recent
survey in the USA reported that a
thunderstock
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thunderstruck
thunder stock
thundershock
80% of young citizens whose rarely
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
parents take care of them spend at least 5 hours per day in front of mobile screens.
This
writer believes that
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
children
's
activity
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activities
show examples
can put the users in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
health-related predicaments
also
social
lives
Change the noun form
life
show examples
malfunctions. First and foremost, leading a sedentary lifestyle and regularly approaching blue light from mobile phones might exacerbate bouts of heart disease symptoms
coupled with
eyes
Change the noun form
eye
show examples
irritation which ultimately hinder the hostilistic
developement
Correct your spelling
development
. Dwelling on
smartphones
in the long run would probably provide
young-aged
Correct your spelling
young
show examples
people with the advantageous chances for making online friends, which equivalently means that
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
friends in person will have the opportunities for deep conversations that create
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
also
issues solving skills. In conclusion, the case
which
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in which
show examples
children
on a regular basis spend their time on
smartphones
stems from the captivating information wrapped internally
couples
Wrong verb form
coupled
show examples
with the scarcity of
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
attention from parents, both of which could lead to the mitigation of health evolvement
as well as
many essential
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
in real life.
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supported main points
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complete response
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clear comprehensive ideas
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relevant specific examples
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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

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Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • smartphones
  • usage
  • technology
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • entertainment
  • gaming
  • social media
  • communication
  • educational resources
  • addiction
  • dependence
  • negative effects
  • physical health
  • mental health
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