Some people think the government should pay for health care and education, but there is no agreement about whether it is the government’s responsibility. What is your opinion?
There are varying views about whether
government
should responsible
for Add a missing verb
be responsible
health
care
and education
. While
some people
are in favor
of Change the spelling
favour
government’s
paying for Correct article usage
the government’s
health
and education
, others would argue that it is not the government’s
responsibility.
On the one hand, people
who defend the government’s
paying for health
care
and education
have a number of justifications. The main argument is that people
will have equal access to enjoy
medical and educational resources if the Verb problem
apply
government
can give fund
on these two aspects. Fix the agreement mistake
funds
For instance
, all children have right
to be educated, but a part of them are too poor to afford tuition, so the Correct article usage
the right
government’s
financial assistance are
necessary for them. Another important reason is about social stability and harmony. Change the verb form
is
In particular
, if most of
Change preposition
apply
people
can enjoy medical and educational resources, the relationship between the government
and the people
will be tighten
. As an example, the gap between rich Change the verb form
be tightened
people
and poor people
will be narrowed if the government
actively pay for health
care
and education
and reduce
Correct subject-verb agreement
reduces
people
’s survival pressure, and then
people
’s confidence in their government
will be enhanced.
On the other hand
, there are some people
argue
that it may not Correct pronoun usage
who argue
government’s
responsibility for free health
care
and education
. It can not be ignored that universal health
care
means huge pressure on revenue for a government
. This
is to say the government
have to undertake more duty on
operating the organization. And we can imagine, if the Change preposition
in
government
fail to maintain a balance between its income and expenditure, it will face a risk of fall
.
Wrong verb form
falling
To conclude
, I approve of government’s
payment for Correct article usage
the government’s
health
care
and education
, because people
’s equal right
will be guaranteed and social stability and harmony will be maintained though the Fix the agreement mistake
rights
government
will face more challenges.Submitted by 285275402 on
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task achievement
Ensure that your essay contains a clear thesis statement that reflects your opinion directly and succinctly. This will make your stance on the issue clearer.
task achievement
Consider including more specific examples to support your points. While you gave an overall good explanation, richer details could make your arguments more compelling.
coherence and cohesion
Work on transitions between paragraphs to enhance the flow of your essay. Using phrases such as 'Moreover', 'Furthermore', or 'In contrast' can help to signal changes in your argument or to add supporting points.
coherence and cohesion
Review your essay's structure. Ensure that each paragraph sticks to a single main idea and that this idea is immediately clear to the reader. This will improve the logical structure and make your essay more coherent.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.