Competition for university study is becoming increasingly strong. Why are universities becoming more competitive? Is this a positive or negative development?

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More people nowadays compete with one another to accomplish their goals. Among these, there is increasing

competition

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to study at prestigious

universities

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. I'll explain why I believe

this

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to be a positive phenomenon and why it occurs in the paragraphs that follow.

This

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competition

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has arisen for a variety of reasons. First of all, the younger generation typically finds well-paying jobs. The most qualified candidates, who typically attend the best

universities

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, would be hired for these positions.

Universities

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thus

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become crucial on a resume for those who are concerned about their prospects for the future.

Additionally

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, the likelihood of success is increased by attending a prestigious university.

This

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due to

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the fact that these

universities

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offer a variety of facilities, which are among the factors that most influence success. Because of various factors, I see

this

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situation positively. First of all, the young people's motivation is increased by

this

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competition

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This

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is why living a meaningful life is a result of having a purpose and working toward realizing it. It cultivates several conductive qualities in itself,

such

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as tenacity, devotion, and diligence.

Second,

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rivalry gives our dull lives some

color

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colour

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. When someone has to work hard to achieve a goal, the process itself will lift her or his spirits in terms of mental health, regardless of the outcome. A professional athlete,

for instance

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, who has dedicated their life to training in order to compete in an international game, is likely to have a better mental state than some individuals who lead meaningless lives. In conclusion, there are a variety of factors contributing to the growing

competition

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among students for admission to

universities

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, and there are some advantages to

this

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development for learners.

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Task Achievement

To improve Task Achievement, ensure that your essay fully answers all parts of the question. Consider both why universities have become more competitive and the implications of this trend. Include specific examples and a balanced discussion on both positive and negative aspects to provide a complete response.

Coherence and Cohesion

For better Coherence and Cohesion, use a clear and logical structure throughout your essay. Start with an introduction that outlines your main points, then use distinct paragraphs for each main idea, and finish with a conclusion that synthesizes your arguments. Make sure transitions between sentences and paragraphs are smooth to guide the reader through your ideas effectively.

Coherence and Cohesion

Incorporate a variety of sentence structures and transitional phrases to enhance flow and readability. This will also help in making your points more supported and your arguments stronger.

7
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

283 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

rising demand
globalization
prestigious
advances in technology
accessibility
employment market
qualifications
limited resources
admission caps
high-quality education
career prospects
online learning
faculty limitations
competitive edge
aspiration
surge

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Competition for university study is becoming increasingly strong. Why are universities becoming more competitive? Is this a positive or negative development?

In many countries, people are consuming more sugar-based drinks than before. Why is this happening, and what could be done to reduce sugary drink consumption.

Some people prefer to live alone. Others enjoy sharing a house with family or friends. Do the advantages of living with others outweigh the disadvantages?

Some parents think that their children should study in other countries because it has a number of benefits. Others think by studying in other countries, children will face a lot of problems. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Some people think that we should invent a new language for international communication. Will the benefits of this outweigh the problems associated with it?

Many people try to balance work and other parts of their life. However, this is very difficult to do. What are the problems associated with this? What is the best way to achieve a better balance?