Anybody can use a mobile phone to answer work and personal calls at any time or 7 days a week. Does this development have more positive or negative effects on both individuals and society?

#anybody #phone #work #time #week #development #effects #individuals #society

To be a member of the modern era where everything is technology-based

hence

, it is proven that mobile phone has a great influence on our lives.

Therefore

, it becomes easy to receive calls on the phone anytime and can be used by each individual easily for personal use and business purposes as well.

According to

my opinion, it has a dual impact on our lives and community. I will discuss both sides in my essay below. To commence with the positive side, mobile phones are becoming necessities these days because almost all the work is done with the help of

this

small gadget whether it is personal or for trading. It is the easiest way to connect

people

all around the world.

Due to

globalization, international trading is rising daily just because of new science equipment.

One

can cover long distances with just

one

click without covering long distances and dealing online by sitting at their own pace. Many

people

from Asian regions are well known for their textile industries and import of clothes from there by making just

one

dial.

Moreover

, it

also

helps boost the economy of the country in many ways big entrepreneur

are

Change the verb form

show examples

spending heavy amounts and making deals online by just

dialing

Change the spelling

dialling

show examples

a number from their smartphone.

Secondly

, there are other advantages it helps to reduce fraud in many ways if someone loses his credit card they can easily call their bank and freeze their account without the hassle of rushing to the bank or omitting from here.

Moreover

, there are certain drawbacks

also

, and because of

this

the range of privacy becomes limited and the level is rising daily. Many

people

who are on holiday are unable to enjoy themselves

due to

heavy workload and pressure from their boss who continuously calls them and bothers them by saying that they need to finish the work on time.

Furthermore

, it impacts health in many ways

due to

high stress

people

are suffering from high blood pressure which is the leading cause of heart attack.

For instance

, the mortality rate of these

people

in increased in these few years. In conclusion, it is a fact that

this

product changes the

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

of individuals in many aspects and has both good and detrimental

affect

Correct your spelling

effects

show examples

one

's life. But here I want to mention it depends on

people

how they utilize

this

gadget and get satisfied from its use.

Submitted by aimenmalik2021 on Sun Mar 17 2024

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task response

Ensure a clear thesis statement in the introduction that directly addresses the question, indicating if the development has more positive or negative effects.

task response

Develop your main points more fully with specific examples and details. This will strengthen your argument and help the reader understand your perspective better.

coherence and cohesion

Work on creating clearer connections and transitions between paragraphs and ideas to enhance the flow of your essay. Use signposting language more effectively to guide the reader through your argument.

task response

Be cautious with generalizations and ensure to back them up with concrete examples or evidence. Avoid making broad statements without supporting them.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

401 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Anybody can use a mobile phone to answer work and personal calls at any time or 7 days a week. Does this development have more positive or negative effects on both individuals and society?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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University education should be free for all students. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The number of overweight children in developed countries is increasing. Some people think this is due to problems such as the growing number of fast food outlets. Others believe that parents are to blame for not looking after their children's health. To what extent do you agree with these views?