In some countries, a few people earn extremely high salaries. Some people think that this is good for a country, while others believe that the government should control salaries and limit the amount people can earn. Discuss both views and give your opinion. (Reported 2017, 2019, 2020, 2022 Academic Test)

#countries #people #salaries #country #government #control #limit #amount #test

Many people argue that there should be a limitation in the maximum wage

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for

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high earners; others,

however

, believe that it should be a freedom for people to get the appropriate salary for their dedication. I agree with the second opinion. On the one hand, the idea of controlling salaries is attractive for several reasons. The first reason is

avoiding

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to avoid

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society

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societal

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inequity that comes from the gap between upper and

lower class

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lower-class

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income.

For example

, the distinction among

human

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humans

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can lead to

socioeconomic

Correct your spelling

socio-economic

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problems

such

as discrimination, unfairness and inequality in treatment. What’s more, the limitation in the average salary will contribute

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reducing crime rates,

offer

Correct word choice

and offer

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more safety for the public.

According to

some studies, researchers have

demonstrate

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demonstrated

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that offenders are formed by the demand of equality that they do not have, so that,

as a result

, not having

highly

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high

show examples

earners can tackle

this

issue.

Nevertheless

, I believe that society would suffer a brain drain if maximum wage legislation

was

Correct subject-verb agreement

were

show examples

adopted.

Firstly

this

action has a hand in pushing away top workers, if the salary does not meet the demands of these people, they will leave and work in a foreign company.

This

will cause a financial

disadvantaged

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disadvantage

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to the business, leading to the loss of a thousand dollars.

In addition

, the loss of intellectual property is

also

harmful to the country.

This

is due

the

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to the

show examples

shortage of breakthroughs or development as high quality labour force

mitigate

Correct subject-verb agreement

mitigates

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gradually and

contribute

Correct subject-verb agreement

contributes

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to other regions. In conclusion,

while

there are some benefits

regard

Wrong verb form

regarding

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setting a limit on the wages of the highest earners, I still believe that it is more disadvantages to

this

. It would have adverse impacts on both business and

country’s

Correct article usage

the country’s

show examples

economy.

Submitted by nguyetcat.dao on Mon Mar 18 2024

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Task Achievement

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Coherence and Cohesion

Work on linking sentences and ideas more smoothly using a wider range of cohesive devices. This will enhance the flow of your essay and make your arguments more compelling.

Coherence and Cohesion

Keep practicing the development of clear and concise introductions and conclusions. While your essay includes these elements, making them more impactful by directly addressing the essay prompt in the introduction and succinctly summarizing your stance in the conclusion can further improve your score.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

283 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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