Many people around the world use social media everyday to keep in touch with other people and get news events. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages ?

Many individuals
through out
Correct your spelling
throughout
show examples
the world use social
network
Fix the agreement mistake
networks
show examples
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
to contact
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
other
people
and gets news notifications.
This
writer believes the benefits of wide selection and
convenience
outweigh the
drawback
Fix the agreement mistake
drawbacks
show examples
of
be
Change the verb form
being
show examples
unconfident. The most
advantages
Replace the word
advantageous
show examples
factor of
convenience
when
use
Change the verb form
using
show examples
social media in life.
In other words
,
people
can save more time that
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
necessary for work or do something important. From prior knowledge, most
people
do not have
more
Replace the word
much
show examples
free time to move and meet
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
partner or friend so
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it
also
help
Change the verb form
helps
show examples
us to connect and chat with them to trade
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
information and
detail
Fix the agreement mistake
details
show examples
.
Thus
, social media has more benefits of
convenience
. Another impact of wide selection
that
Add a missing verb
is that
show examples
it can help us to choose and save money. It must be recognized that
people
can buy
no
Change preposition
with no
show examples
limit and choose good things, we can have a discount ticket to reduce
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
show examples
when we use
Add an article
the app
an app
show examples
app
Fix the agreement mistake
apps
show examples
to
shopping
Replace the word
shop
show examples
or
Correct your spelling
for
show examples
clothing. It is necessary to
easy
Change the word
easily
show examples
look up the information
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the internet with the
correctly
Change the adverb
correct
show examples
detail
Fix the agreement mistake
details
show examples
to help us to realize and work hard.
However
, a few
people
are become
Change to the active voice
become
have become
show examples
unconfident
to lead
Verb problem
apply
show examples
in their
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
. They
interacted
Wrong verb form
interact
show examples
with mobile
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
show examples
or electrical equipment
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
a long time and
then
they do not play around or communicate with other
people
, it makes them become shy and
confuse
Wrong verb form
confused
show examples
when they meet or play with someone. Taking all points into account, the possible impact of unconfident is outweighed by the benefit of
convenience
and wide selection.
Hence
, using social media can be more beneficial for
people
to lead in their
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
.
Submitted by [email protected] on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
It's essential to consistently check for grammatical accuracy and ensure sentences are well-constructed for clarity. Try to avoid run-on sentences and ensure proper punctuation. Additionally, using varied sentence structures can enhance the readability of your essay.
task achievement
Focusing on developing each point with more depth and supporting each advantage or disadvantage with specific examples can provide a clearer and more compelling argument. Instead of general statements, give detailed examples that demonstrate your points effectively.
coherence cohesion
Ensure your introduction clearly outlines what you will discuss, and your conclusion summarizes your main points effectively. Both sections are crucial for orienting the reader and providing a satisfying closure to your argument.
coherence cohesion
Avoid repetition of phrases and try to expand your vocabulary to better express ideas. This will not only make your essay more interesting to read but also show a higher level of English proficiency.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • facilitate
  • geographically separated
  • fostering
  • connectivity
  • instant communication
  • real-time information
  • misinformation
  • rigorous checks and balances
  • fake news
  • addictive nature
  • detract
  • face-to-face interactions
  • mental health
  • awareness of limitations
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!