IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Parents should spend more time with their children helping them with their homework. Do you agree or disagree

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Parents
Use synonyms
 are in a crucial position to affect their
children
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 directly, and it is being acknowledged that parenting is important. So, I totally disagree with
this
Linking Words
 statement. Of course,
parents
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 can help with their kids’s
homework
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, but
children
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 should have to learn self-management and problem-solving abilities. These days, it is on the table that
children
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 are becoming too dependent on their
parents
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. They learn how to manage themselves from their
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parents’s
Remove the s
parents’
show examples
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
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 and how their
parents
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 treat them. Spending time with their
children
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 is important.
Therefore
Linking Words
,
parents
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 should spend time with their kids more productively and efficiently.
For example
Linking Words
, going outside in a park, having dinner together, or doing something like that kind of activity, not doing
homework
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,.
Change the punctuation
,
.
show examples
Furthermore
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, they need to improve their problem-solving skills when they are young. They can realize how they can solve the problem more wisely and efficiently in their lives. So that they can solve any problem or concern when they face their own problems,
such
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 as those related to real life or something like school assignments,
for instance
Linking Words
, they can learn many things when they do the
homework
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 themselves,
such
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 as from society, mathematical, scientific, or even cultural problems. They learn how to deal with each problem when they are solving it alone.
Parents
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 encourage their kids to discuss other people when they face difficult problems or don’t have any idea about them. In conclusion, I do not agree that
parents
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 should help their kids with their
homework
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. So, they should solve
homework
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, and
parents
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 should encourage them to develop their independence and problem-solving skills.

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Task Achievement
To improve your essay regarding task response, ensure that you clearly address the prompt throughout your essay. While you disagree with the statement provided, providing specific reasons and elaborating on those reasons could enhance your response. It would be beneficial to add more varied and detailed examples to fully support your viewpoint.
Coherence and Cohesion
For better coherence and cohesion, try to use a wider range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas more smoothly. Moreover, organizing the essay into clear paragraphs each focusing on a specific point will help the reader to follow your argument more easily.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • parental involvement
  • academic development
  • parent-child relationship
  • supported and encouraged
  • confidence and independence
  • educational strategies
  • autonomous learning
  • foster a love for learning
  • tailored interventions
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