Television dominates the free-time of too many people. It can make people lazy and prevent them from socialising with others.

#television #free-time #people

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Television

Use synonyms

has

Verb problem

show examples

considered one of the important means of entertainment in

majority's

Correct article usage

the majority's

show examples

life.

Linking Words

While these

Correct word choice

These

show examples

screens offer enormous ways to enjoy leisure

time

Use synonyms

evolve

Correct word choice

and evolve

show examples

our thinking

Change preposition

apply

show examples

about what's going on around us. Despite

Change preposition

apply

show examples

this

Linking Words

, many

thinks

Correct subject-verb agreement

think

show examples

increasess

Correct your spelling

increases

a sense of laziness and

hamper

Correct subject-verb agreement

hampers

show examples

one's interacting skills.

As per

Change preposition

show examples

my opinion,

Use synonyms

is important to enjoy our lives

however

Linking Words

in a limited manner. If screens

being

Add a missing verb

are being

show examples

watched

alot

Correct your spelling

a lot

than

Correct your spelling

then

show examples

for sure it can create a lot of trouble. To embark upon, following up on

television

Use synonyms

channels

Use synonyms

for a definite period of

time

Use synonyms

in a day has great benefits. In a way, screens

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

offered significant

informations

Change the wording

information

pieces of information

show examples

, general knowledge in terms of science

channels

Use synonyms

, creativity collected from all over the world etc. Shuffling through these

channels

Use synonyms

makes

offsprings

Fix the agreement mistake

offspring

show examples

Fix the infinitive

apply

show examples

learn new skills and gain knowledge.

For example

Linking Words

- Discoveries and

science related

Add a hyphen

science-related

show examples

channels

Use synonyms

are

proved

Correct your spelling

proven

show examples

to be

most

Correct article usage

the most

show examples

watched

Use synonyms

Correct your spelling

show examples

channels

Use synonyms

among teenagers , as per the TOI survey.

However

Linking Words

, If the same screen

time

Use synonyms

goes over for more hours

everyday

Replace the word

every day

show examples

then

Linking Words

it could create issues.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, if screen

time

Use synonyms

is relatively more

then

Linking Words

it can create a lot of concerns. On many occasions, kids tend to watch

television

Use synonyms

for longer hours ,

due to

Linking Words

which they might face vision problems at an early age.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, those who spend more

time

Use synonyms

, they spend less

time

Use synonyms

to interact

Change the verb form

interacting

show examples

with other youngsters.

Change preposition

show examples

result

Correct article usage

a result

show examples

this

Linking Words

would cause

lack

Correct article usage

a lack

show examples

communicating

Replace the word

communication

show examples

skills.

Hence

Linking Words

, it is crucial to limit their screen

time

Use synonyms

to mitigate various issues.

To conclude

Linking Words

Television

Use synonyms

are

Change the verb form

show examples

a great source of learning and exploring different horizons of knowledge .

However

Linking Words

, in order to avoid negative consequences, children need to utilise them in a limited manner.

In addition

Linking Words

, we should allow our kids to watch

Use synonyms

Correct your spelling

show examples

in a controlled manner, monitoring the usage to make the most

learning

Change preposition

of learning

show examples

along with

Linking Words

avoiding any negative aspects.

Submitted by kukretihimani767 on Tue Mar 19 2024

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coherence cohesion

Focus on developing clear and distinct paragraphs, each supporting a single main point. This will enhance the logical structure of your essay.

coherence cohesion

Include a more distinct introduction and conclusion. Your introduction should more clearly outline your essay's structure, and your conclusion should succinctly summarize your main points and restate your position.

coherence cohesion

Enhance coherence by using a wider range of linking words and phrases to better connect ideas between sentences and paragraphs.

task achievement

Address the task by ensuring that your response fully answers all parts of the prompt. Expand on how television can make people lazy and prevent socializing, providing balanced arguments and specific examples.

task achievement

Clarify and develop your ideas and viewpoints more comprehensively. Each paragraph should explore its main point in depth, backed by specific examples or evidence.

task achievement

Incorporate more varied and specific examples to support your arguments. These examples should be clearly linked to the points they are supporting and be detailed enough to convincingly illustrate your ideas.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
30
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

317 words

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Television dominates the free-time of too many people. It can make people lazy and prevent them from socialising with others.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In some countries, it is illegal for companies to reject job applicants for their age. Is this a positive or negative development?

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. why might this be the case? Do you thinkthis is a positive or negative situation?

In some countries, more and more adults are living with their parents after graduating from college, university or even after finding a job. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

The internet has a bigger impact on people's lives because it is more popular than television. Do you agree or disagree? Write at least 220 words.

Please answer very good answer to this It will be better to have wide use of driverless cars for individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.