Many people around the world use social media everyday to keep in touch withother people and get news events. Do ou think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Nowadays, mobile
phones
are used by the public anywhere,
community
Correct article usage
The community
show examples
uses cell
phones
in their regular lives, mostly to interact with each other. Using mobile
phones
helps individuals interact with each other more easily than in the past, and
also
faster so it is very convenient.
In contrast
, using smartphones made social become less communicative face to face.
This
essay will analyse both sides and give the writer's opinion that using mobile
phones
will make human society better.
One
factor can be that in the past, when 1 person was away from another, it seemed hard to chat with each other and had to use letter co-op with pigeons to ship to
one
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
wasted
time
and led to difficulties in communication.
For example
, you live far away from your girlfriend and had an argument with her, you want to talk and explain to her what is going on, but when you send the messages, it takes 3-4 days to ship to her house and maybe in
this
date, she may have new boyfriend, what a terrible situation despite the fact that you did not do anything.
Moreover
, chatting online helps
one
can have many talks with many
people
at the same
time
, so it will be more convenient
due to
the pace when sending messages and gaining another are very fast. Another worthwhile point is that using a mobile phone can give
people
instant information, at a state-of-the-art
time
, when the world changing very fast, leading to information increase, interaction by using the phone will make it safe any
time
.
For example
, when having emergency notifications , mobile
phones
can send them anywhere in the world in 1-2 seconds, working effectively to help
people
too much. On the contrast side, using mobile
phones
makes
people
addicted to the virtual world and it may cause a lack of communication, at
state
Add an article
the state
show examples
of the art
time
, it is easy to see that many young can not talk with their partner fluently,
this
status may worse if do not have the way to solve.
Therefore
, using mobile
phonesphones
Correct your spelling
phones
too much can lead
people
to a robot way. In conclusion, cell
phones
help
people
live easier
due to
the pace and convenience they give to society.
Moreover
, human society may get advantages when it turns to the 4.0 era.
One
thing noticeable that we must keep in mind and pay attention to is the age we use mobile
phones
, reduce the
time
we use and control it.
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Coherence and Cohesion
To improve your essay, it's essential to refine your structure for better coherence and cohesion. Begin by clearly outlining your points in the introduction, followed by a distinct paragraph for each argument supported by specific examples. The conclusion should then succinctly summarize your viewpoints, referring back to the question posed.
Task Achievement
Enhance your task response by ensuring that your essay fully addresses the question. Discuss both advantages and disadvantages in a balanced manner, offering a clear opinion on whether one outweighs the other. Incorporating more varied and detailed examples can also help illustrate your points more effectively.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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