Many people around the world use social media everyday to keep in touch with other people and get new events. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?
In the digital era, the use of social networking for
information
exchange between people
and access to news is becoming more popular. While
this
trend helps people
keep in touch with long-distance relationships and quickly get information
, I believe the risk of receiving misinformation and the inability to have face-to-face conversations outweigh the benefits.
It can not be denied that social media helps people
easily connect with people
on the other side of the world. Examples are Twitter or Facebook where everybody can keep track of others' lives by interacting in posts and chatting online. As a result
, people
can still connect far relationships without frequent direct meetings.
Moreover
, social networking also
allws
users to access Correct your spelling
allows
information
quickly. Owing to the freedom of speech, everyone can post anything they want with no censorship. This
enables information
to be disseminated much faster than traditional news outlets such
as state-run broadcasts, thus
giving citizens more time to react to an emergency situation like earthquakes.
However
, the proliferation of self-posted news can contribute to an increasing amount of misinformation since most of them are unverified. Take COVID-19 as an example, many Vietnamese during this
time posted sensational yet groundless rumours, causing fear in the community.
Additionally
, the disadvantages of social media can seen when people
use it too much and gradually become overreliant. This
is witnessed a lot in the young generation which grows up along with
the developments of the Internet. Some of them consider chatting on social media as the right and only way to communicate and subsequently
, do not know how to conduct real-life conversations.Submitted by [email protected] on
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Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay overall is well-structured and addresses the task effectively. However, to enhance your score, try improving some of your sentences for clarity and fluidity. For example, "Examples are Twitter or Facebook..." could be rephrased to "Social media platforms such as Twitter and Facebook..." Also, aim for more varied sentence structures to enhance readability.
Task Achievement
Your essay does a commendable job of discussing both sides of the argument and providing relevant examples. To strengthen your essay further, consider expanding on how misinformation can specifically affect day-to-day life or provide more instances where overreliance on social media has had noticeable social impacts.
Task Achievement
You provided a balanced view of the topic by addressing both the advantages and disadvantages of social media, which is key for a well-rounded discussion.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your main points were logically structured, each paragraph focusing on a clear idea related to either the benefit or drawback of social media use.
Coherence and Cohesion
Each of your paragraphs presented and supported its main point effectively, contributing to a coherent overall argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.