Many people around the world use social media everyday to keep in touch with other people and get news events. Do you think the advantages outweight the disadvantages ?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
today
Change noun form
today's
show examples
digital era, social
media
Use synonyms
has become an important part of a day of many
Use synonyms
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
lives around the world
due to
Linking Words
it helps
people
Use synonyms
to update
news
Use synonyms
and
connects
Correct subject-verb agreement
connect
show examples
with others.
This
Linking Words
author agrees that the
time
Use synonyms
-saving and breaking distance
outweight
Correct your spelling
outweighs
deterioration in health. The most
advantages
Replace the word
advantageous
show examples
factor of
ultilising
Correct your spelling
utilising
utilizing
social
media
Use synonyms
in
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
helps us save
ours
Correct pronoun usage
our
show examples
time
Use synonyms
in
get
Change the verb form
getting
show examples
news
Use synonyms
events.
In other words
Linking Words
,
peole
Correct your spelling
people
who tackle
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
work can thrifty their limited
time
Use synonyms
by using social
media
Use synonyms
to update information via online posts.
For example
Linking Words
, the duration of a
news
Use synonyms
usually
lasts
Verb problem
takes
show examples
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
hours to watch
full
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
but on Facebook the
news
Use synonyms
report
divides
Wrong verb form
is divided
show examples
into many posts which only take
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
minutes to
viewed
Change the form of the verb
view
show examples
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, social
media
Use synonyms
become more and more necessary in our
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
.
In addition
Linking Words
, some
people
Use synonyms
believe that social
media
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
brings
people
Use synonyms
who are far away
beceome
Correct your spelling
become
closer. It means
people
Use synonyms
who
far
Add a missing verb
are far
show examples
from each other can easily keep in touch without
obtacle
Correct your spelling
obstacle
obstacles
caused by distance. Take Zalo as an example, Vietnamese can chat or video call with
people
Use synonyms
located
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
another side of the world immediately whenever they want.
Thus
Linking Words
, social
media
Use synonyms
needs to be widely developed and developed around us.
However
Linking Words
, proponents of non-using social
media
Use synonyms
propose that
people
Use synonyms
are too
addict
Wrong verb form
addicted
show examples
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
those apps leads to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
laziness and
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
show examples
lots of health care problems like
overweight
Add a missing verb
being overweight
show examples
.
This
Linking Words
may be true but can
be mitigate
Change the verb form
be mitigated
show examples
by
control
Replace the word
controlling
show examples
Use synonyms
time
Correct article usage
the time
show examples
of use in
appropriate
Add an article
an appropriate
the appropriate
show examples
way.
As a result
Linking Words
, they need to think carefully before using social
media
Use synonyms
for a
long-period
Correct your spelling
long period
show examples
Use synonyms
Change preposition
of time
show examples
time
Change preposition
of time
show examples
. On balance, the
decrese
Correct your spelling
decrease
of health is
outweight
Correct your spelling
outweighed
by the benefits of technology.
Hence
Linking Words
, social
media
Use synonyms
should be
ultilize
Correct your spelling
utilize
more popular around the world.
Submitted by [email protected] on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Review basic punctuation rules and the structure of English sentences to ensure clarity. Misuse of punctuation and sentence fragments can hinder coherence.
task achievement
Develop a clearer thesis statement in your introduction. This sets the stage for your argument and improves task response.
task achievement
Expand and deepen your argument with more varied and specific examples. Using concrete examples strengthens your points and task response.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences within it directly support this idea to improve coherence.
coherence cohesion
Use linking words and phrases to clearly show the relationship between ideas, improving the flow of your essay.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • geographical boundaries
  • real-time updates
  • professional networks
  • mental health concerns
  • excessive use
  • fake news
  • data privacy
  • personal information
  • networking
  • misinformation
What to do next:
Look at other essays: