IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

many people aroung the world use social media everyday to keep in touch with other people and get news events. Do you think the advantage outweigh the disavantage?

in the internet era, a group of
people
Use synonyms
 said that it is necessary for
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
 to
use
Use synonyms
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
media
Use synonyms
 to connect with society and get news easier
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
. It brings lots of positive
change
Fix the agreement mistake
changes
show examples
 for
media
Use synonyms
 and
entertainments
Fix the agreement mistake
entertainment
show examples
such
Linking Words
 as increasing the number of users and
also
Linking Words
improve
Wrong verb form
improving
show examples
 the percentage of
loyal
Add an article
the loyal
a loyal
show examples
user
Fix the agreement mistake
users
show examples
, but the drawback is
the
Correct determiner usage
that
show examples
 social
media
Use synonyms
 is
addicted
Replace the word
addictive
show examples
 to young
people
Use synonyms
due to
Linking Words
 bad effects on physical and mental health.
This
Linking Words
 writer will explain more
the
Change preposition
about the
show examples
advantage
Fix the agreement mistake
advantages
show examples
 and drawbacks following the essay.
The social
Correct article usage
Social
show examples
media
Use synonyms
 is being used
over
Rephrase
all over
show examples
 the world because it has many
usefullness
Correct your spelling
usefulness
such
Linking Words
 it indepent of distance, nationality,
languega
Correct your spelling
language
 or religion. It is easy to
use
Use synonyms
 for both
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
ages and has
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 friendly interface and the most
thing
Correct word choice
important thing
show examples
 is it
bring
Change the verb form
brings
show examples
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
news
Change preposition
of news
show examples
over
Rephrase
all over
show examples
 the world.
For example
Linking Words
,
facebook
Capitalize word
Facebook
show examples
 is
Correct article usage
a
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
Add a hyphen
well-known
show examples
well known
Add a hyphen
well-known
show examples
 app,
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
owned
Add a missing verb
is owned
show examples
 by Meta company it has more than 1.2
biliion
Correct your spelling
billion
Fix the agreement mistake
users
show examples
user
Fix the agreement mistake
users
show examples
 every
Fix the agreement mistake
hour
show examples
hours
Fix the agreement mistake
hour
show examples
.
Capitalize word
That
show examples
that
Capitalize word
That
show examples
 why it
Correct subject-verb agreement
brings
show examples
bring
Correct subject-verb agreement
brings
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
various
type
Fix the agreement mistake
types
show examples
 of news from entertainment to
Fix the agreement mistake
education
show examples
educations
Fix the agreement mistake
education
show examples
 and
Change preposition
besides
show examples
beside
Change preposition
besides
show examples
 that it created a
lagre
Correct your spelling
large
 of potential
Fix the agreement mistake
places
show examples
place
Fix the agreement mistake
places
show examples
 for sellers.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, social
media
Use synonyms
 apps are one of the
reason
Change to a plural noun
reasons
show examples
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 psychosomatic illness
at
Change preposition
for
show examples
 a part of
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
nowaday
Correct your spelling
nowadays
show examples
,
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 make
people
Use synonyms
 not
want
Add the particle
want to
show examples
 hang out or have outside activities,
connect
Correct word choice
and connect
show examples
 with
another
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
poeple
Correct your spelling
people
. They
depent
Correct your spelling
depend
 on
meida
Correct your spelling
media
 apps,
Correct word choice
and thay
show examples
thay
Correct your spelling
they
Use synonyms
use
Verb problem
spend
show examples
 almost their time for
ones
Fix the agreement mistake
one
show examples
. Take example, the newspaper said that nearly 20
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of
people
Use synonyms
 get
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 bad illness cause
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
use
Use synonyms
 the apps very much. In conclusion,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
social
media
Use synonyms
 always has
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
positive and negative
affects
Correct your spelling
effects
show examples
, it
depent
Correct your spelling
depends
depend
 on our consciousness of
Use synonyms
use
Change the verb form
using
show examples
 it. It can bring
people
Use synonyms
 closer together but make
they
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 far away. How we
use
Use synonyms
 it will
be bring
Change the verb form
bring
show examples
 the
Correct your spelling
positive
positve
Correct your spelling
positive
 or negative results

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logical structure
Ensure a clear and logical structure throughout your essay. Organize your thoughts clearly by having distinct paragraphs for your introduction, each main point, and conclusion to make your argument or stance more compelling.
introduction/conclusion present
Always include an introduction and a conclusion. The introduction should present the topic and your viewpoint clearly, while the conclusion should summarize your main points and restate your position, providing a satisfying closure to your argument.
supported main points
To support your main points more effectively, incorporate a wider range of examples and evidence. While you did use examples, diversifying your sources and the type of evidence can strengthen your arguments.
complete response
To achieve a complete response to the task, make sure to address all parts of the prompt thoroughly. This includes discussing both sides of an argument if required, and making sure your stance is clear and well supported throughout the essay.
clear/comprehensive ideas
Strive for clarity and comprehensiveness in presenting your ideas. Use precise language and ensure your arguments are well-developed. Try to explore your ideas more deeply to provide a thorough understanding of your stance to the reader.
relevant/specific examples
When providing examples, ensure they are relevant and specific to the point you're trying to make. Also, consider utilizing a range of examples, including personal experiences, statistical data, or well-known events, to reinforce your argument.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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