More people decided to have children in their later age than in the past. Why? Do advantages of this outweigh disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

People
nowadays definitely get married later than in the past. Currently, the new word 'Dink' shows up, which means
people
who chose not to have
children
. Siblings were common when I was young, but nowadays, I can come across only
children
more often. In my opinion, having a
baby
has more disadvantages than advantages. We will illustrate the reason why
people
choose not to have a
baby
in
this
essay. First of all, Individualism gets stronger than before. Some
people
say the happiest thing in the world is having
children
, but
this
quote does not have strong empathy nowadays. Modern society has more resources than before
due to
the rapid evaluation of technology and the environment.
People
do not need to depend on each other and each life of an individual gets more focused.
Secondly
, living expenses rise extremely, which means expenditures for raising
children
rise too. In South Korea,
overall
costs for education until university costs 100,000,000 KRW to 400,000,000 KRW. As the global economy has been not growing in the
last
decades, the high costs of education burden the
parents
.
Last
but not least, brides and brooms are older than before. The appropriate
age
for safe pregnancy is before 36. In South Korea, the average
age
of marriage is approximately 35, which illustrates marriage
age
is older compared to the past, my
parents
married at 30 years old. Latency of marriage
age
makes pregnancy difficult, which leads to
parents
deciding not to have a
baby
. Of course, there are significant advantages to having a
baby
. You could be a better person by learning patience and responsibility.
However
, without social or government support,
parents
will hesitate to have a
baby
.
Submitted by forbid403 on

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task achievement
Ensure that you directly address all parts of the task in your introduction. Your essay should clearly answer the question, explaining why more people decide to have children at a later age, and whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
coherence cohesion
Try to have a clear thesis statement in your introduction that outlines your main points. This helps in guiding the reader through your essay and understanding your stance on the issue.
coherence cohesion
Make sure that your conclusion summarizes your main points and restates your position clearly, tying it directly to the task response. This helps in reinforcing your argument and providing a clear end to your essay.
task achievement
Use more specific examples to illustrate your points, drawing from a wider range of sources or personal experiences. While the details about South Korea provide some context, additional examples or data from other sources could strengthen your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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