Some people believe studying in a college or university is the best way to prepare for a successful career. Other people prefer to get a job as soon as they leave school and to develop their career through work experience. Discuss both views and give your own opinio

The discussion of whether getting a degree or hands-on
experience
offers a better career path has sparked a substantial debate.
While
many advocate for studying at college because it would open doors to skilled jobs, others argue for starting a
job
after high school, since practice is a better teacher. From my perspective, I support the first viewpoint.
Therefore
, analyzing these facts will give a comprehensive understanding of
this
subject matter. On the one hand, having years of practice in a field equips the individual with the best knowledge to excel.
For instance
, a survey from my recently completed capstone project showed that employers give preference to individuals with work
experience
during recruitment. Clearly, years of work
experience
gives an edge in landing an appointment.
Thus
, people should get a
job
right after secondary school.
On the other hand
, having a university certificate opens numerous doors to a well-paid skilled role.
For example
, I was employed as a restaurant manager because of my degree certificate. Obviously, a skilled position is an office only a university education can fetch you.
Hence
, folks should attend tertiary education to land leadership roles in a firm. In my opinion, graduating from college ensures that one has a fulfilling career not doing unskilled menial jobs for a living. In conclusion, the question
whether
Change preposition
of whether
show examples
people ought to pursue a university degree or get a
job
right after high school has prompted considerable deliberation. Many champion the idea that a college diploma offers the opportunity to get a skilled
job
, others refute
this
highlighting the importance of years of
experience
in a field. From the way I see it, the former standpoint is better. Examining both points of view and giving my opinion has given
an
Correct pronoun usage
me an
show examples
extensive understanding of
this
topic.
Submitted by Eby on

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Task Achievement
To improve Task Achievement: Ensure your essay directly addresses all parts of the task. While your essay does touch on both views and provides your opinion, make it more evident how each part of the discussion contributes towards a comprehensive understanding of the topic. Consider framing your opinion more robustly by evaluating both viewpoints, then justifying why one outweighs the other with more specific reasoning or evidence.
Coherence & Cohesion
To enhance Coherence and Cohesion: Your logical structure is commendable, but to aim for a higher band, work on creating even clearer connections between your ideas. This can be done through more varied and precise linking phrases. Additionally, ensure each paragraph focuses on one main idea and utilizes cohesive devices effectively to guide the reader through your argument seamlessly.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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